Tacos
My girlfriend and I broke up about a month ago after almost a year together. It wasn’t ugly. no cheating, no cruelty, no blocked numbers. We both cried. She reached out the next morning to apologize, I sent her a pretty long and heartfelt message in response, no chasing or begging, just accountability and understanding. At that point I felt really heavily blamed for everything. I thought that was the end and then she blindsided me five days later with a seriously thoughtful message taking accountability for her role in things and essentially weakening her own breakup reasons. She questioned if things couldve been different had she handled things differently, told me I was special to her, etc. I responded warmly. I didnt fight or push more on what I wanted. Since then it’s been silence.
She has some anxiety and trust issues that played a role in how things ended. But it 100% was not all on her. I truly do take a ton of responsibility for the way things played out. I got complacent toward the end in the last 2 months and didn’t show up the way I should have. She deserved more than that. She started therapy about 2 months before we parted ways. We both played a part and she acknowledged that directly.
The ending feels really unresolved and unclosed. Nothing about it felt final. She didn’t slam the door she just stepped back. She’s completely quiet on social media, no signs of moving on, still has things of mine.
I’ve been giving her space because I know she needed it. But it’s been 3 weeks now since her apology and the silence is getting harder to sit with.
My question is how do you know when space has been long enough? And for those who have been in similar situations, did reaching out help or hurt?
Did giving space actually work?
Not looking for false hope, just honest perspectives from people who’ve been through something similar