u/Illustrious_Sea9024

i have to make a choice asap, HNLU is top in tier 2 but is far away from my home and that's the only concern..what should i chose???

so me and my boyfriend have been dating 4 saal se, he was the bestetstetstest boy on earth alright? he treated me SOOO DAMN GOOD. Some context- according to people, im too good for him, he doesnt look good, he is weird etc etc. and we have literally got bullied for being together because people believe i deserve better. anyway, Fast forward last year, we started having a lot of fights. There were times in the past where it was very obvious to me that he was lying because whatever CRAP he said sounded unebelievable but everytime he somehow convinced me that he's being truthful and so i stayed with him ok.
Now before you judge me, i know for a fucking FACT that he DOES love me very much. I know.

We started having fights because he kept messing up, sometimes not remembering things i have told him, sometimes minor issues and stuff

now this year in january his mental health got fucked up, because his family has some issue ok, and on top of that we were having CRAZY fights all the time about random shit that he promises to do but doesnt do- for eg, he knows damn well that he's gonna get bullied more if he doesnt hit the gym ASAP but pichle 4 fucking saal se this guy has been PROMISING ME that he's gonna glow up and shit not because i asked him , but because he WANTS TO BE THE MANNNN FOR MEEE AND ALL THAT BULLSHIT, like, he's constantly expressing how he thinks im gonna find someone better in college and all so he wants to become hot and shit, but he goes to gym for 2 days and then something comes up and he doesnt go for a month or so. the thing is, something ALWAYS COMES UP. ONE DAY HE IS SICK, OTHER DAY HIS DOG IS IN THE HOSPITAL, NEXT TIME HIS PARENTS ARE GETTING DIVORCED, IT'S ENDLESSSSSSS.
and ok fine, you wanna stay like this, stay like this, idc.
I HAVE TOLD HIM 10000000000000000000000000000000000000000 times to LET ME KNOW when he reached his coaching so that i dont KEEP WAITING FOR THE NEXT 3 HOURS. THIS BITCH always says "i know, i realize it takes less then 1 second to text, i'm sorry, it wont happen again i promise" AND SOMEHOW STILL FORGETS TO LMK. IM SOOOO SICK OF THIS SHIT.
LOVE IS NOOOTTTTT ENOUGHHHHH.

NO MATTER HOW MUCH WE LOVE EACH OTHER. THIS GUY GETS ON MY FUCKING NERVES UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I WOULD HAVE LEFT HIM FOR REAL BUT IM SO ATTACHEDDDDDDDD

TLDR: I HATE THE GUY THAT I LOVE. HE'S AN IDIOT. also galti se title mein 19 f likhdiya, obvi he is 19 M

so i don't actually have a very good MUN experience tbh, but i have participated in a lot of debates and won prizes as well. Somehow i managed to convince my ex-school authorities to select me as the vice chair of UNHRC (i've never done that committee aaj tak😭) and i'm actually kinda nervous like uhhhhhhh
SO I NEED SOMEBODY to help me chill tf out and tell me how to handle this position please lol thanks