u/Illustrious_Sir_1727

Hey.
I post back again from my other post "Stuck in a 1 year loop", and since then, I actually did worst. I fell back and masturbated 3 times. I can't, I just doesn't understand how to stop. Even with the advices I see from other brother doesn't work for me; either I forgot to use them or they just don't work.
I don't want to spend another summer full of haram like last year. I was suffering, fake smile, and was ashamed. I don't want to go another year. I can't, and I won't.

Everything I tried. Phone away from the room, be surrounded (not alone), phone away during night. What haven't I tried yet, I really want to know. Maybe I forgot something very important, please tell me. I don't find myself anymore in this, I actually never. But at least today I opened my eyes from this loop, and told that I am going to leave it. But I can't really see any progress; the opposite happens.

I really want to leave this sin, following me for a year, and blocking me from achieving more in my life and the afterlife. I know Allah is testing me to see if I am going to stick to Him, and yes I am, at least trying as much as I can. But for my age, I feel like I have lived too much.

I need to leave, and I will. But how? What am I missing.

Hello.
I am here to express myself, something I have never done.
I have been stuck in a constant loop for 1 year now, weekly masturbating and watching porn. And I don't know how to get out of it.

I think I am doing some progress recently: I have stopped denying the truth, I have accepted what I do, and try to avoid the pattern where it happens. But the thing is that for me I masturbate really randomly (but watching porn goes with masturbating, so if I stop masturbating I will stop porn with it). Like it's not the night, it is mostly the day. But from what I have seen, I think it happens when: I am bored, I am stressed, and I haven't token the time for Allah.

I feel ashamed, don't speak to anyone about it, don't know where to go.
And to be honest, I am deeply pious aside doing it, I try to be better and better every time. But I feel like if I remove that, I will definitely unlock more. I know it blocks me from something better behind it.

Please help me, advices, I will take everything in consideration.
Thanks a lot.