u/ImNotTooSureOkThanks

Alright so I’m out and about with my brother, who started dropping some rancid farts. I kindly suggest perhaps he should go to the toilet.

He tells me he’ll just wait til he gets home…which would be in about 3 hours from that moment.

I’m absolutely shook.

As soon as I am in a public setting, I’ve already located all potential toilets. My Estimated Time to Shit (ETS) from first sensation is a maximum of 10 minutes on the best of days.

I could not tell you the amount of close calls I have had over my adult life, fortunate enough to have not soiled my dacks since the great incident of ‘17.

It absolutely boggles my mind that most normal people (although my brother is not normal) can just “hold it”