I didnt realize it hurt that bad
I cant get it out of my head. Our baby is 7 months old, Ive had sciatica since before he was born. Ive been in so much pain Ive barely been able to dress myself, I thought my back must be broken. I broke down crying almost every night, completely dissociated during the day so I can clean the house, take care of the baby and our pets. I finally was able to go to urgentcare to see if my back is broken, to beg for an xray or meds or something. "When we get home youre gonna have to take care of him, I have a lot of work to do." Broke down in front of the nurses begging them to help me. Gave me mega anti-inflammatories and need an MRI. Took them and my waist went down 2 inches because of how inflamed my back was.
"I didnt realize how bad it was."
I cried to you every night for months? Begging for help? Our baby was the only thing keeping me going, I wanted to die. But you didnt realize? Thought I was just being dramatic?
My back feels better on the meds, but I dont. Its echoing in my head and haunting me.
Have you even been listening to me?