AITAH for wanting my parents to stay with us after a week post partum? Same sex couple
We had our baby about a week and a half ago and my wife was the one who carried the baby. I was stayed at home the first week and didn’t have any interaction with anyone at the request of my wife. I asked her if she wanted her mother here for the birth and she said no, that she wanted it to just be us two getting settled and to experience the birth as a couple. I am very different and wanted my parents here right after the birth but I abided by my wife’s request to have the first week to ourselves for her healing and my son to get into the rhythm at home. Now a week has passed and I want my parents to come out, and she says no. I spoke with my parents and they said they would rather wait until June because flights are so expensive last minute and want to have a week out where we live so the visit isn’t rushed. I told my wife this after I got back from a walk and she got so mad because she changed her mind and said they could come. After some thought, I decided okay, I really need/want my parents out here too for help and think it would be nice to have them meet their first grandchild. As soon as I told them they could come, they asked both of us TWICE before booking if it was okay, and the wife said yes it’s fine. Flash forward to this morning and I walk into our bedroom to my wife bawling in bed saying she doesn’t want them to come even after my parents booked the flight. We have a huge blowout fight because I’m feeling like I’m experiencing whiplash with the indecisiveness. Then she starts laying out very strict rules: our son will not be “thrown around like a hot potato.” No kissing (obviously I agree with this), no shoes on in the house (agreed!!) and hand washing before holding babies. Now we are 2 hours from me picking them up from the airport and she’s in the car with me driving home from my aunt and uncles house and she’s saying they need to stay with my aunt and uncle last minute. Wtf!? Am I the asshole for saying no? I am a first time parent too. I understand I didn’t give birth, but I want/need my parents here and would like them to stay at OUR house. I just feel like this whole experience has been ruined as a result of my wife’s anxiety. She has mental health history of anxiety/OCD and feel like it has gotten worse 10x. I have asked her to see a therapist for years now and doesn’t want to and now that we are here it’s worse and I’m worried it’s going to affect my child as well as time goes on.