My Only Parent Died A Week Ago And I’m Drowning.
Hi,
I’m 27F and I just lost my mom (68F) on the 8th of May, two days before Mother’s Day and 5 days before my 27th birthday. She was my only parent and I lived with her and my mentally disabled brother.
We were standing in the kitchen talking and my mom just collapsed, her heart stopped due to a serious V-fib episode and didn’t restart. I did CPR until the police and medics came and took over. I saw her dead, I felt bones break when doing CPR, and saw her chest expand when I gave her breaths and it wasn’t enough. She died after 5 horrible days in ICU where she had seizures and a tube in her throat.
It was a normal day until it wasn’t and all I wish I could do is hug her and tell her I love her more than anything in this world. I wish she was conscious when she passed so know if she heard me say goodbye. I feel like I’m drowning and that it will never be okay again. We were two peas in a pod and it feels like my heart has been ripped out of my chest, how do I keep going in life? How do I take care of my brother and myself? I can’t eat or sleep or do anything I need to like take care of her affairs because I feel so lost and scared. I feel like a lost 10 year old that no one can help and I don’t know what to do.