How did you know?
I’m not sure. I’ve read the “straight women don’t do these things.” Mostly I just know I don’t want touched.
I realize I’ve never liked being groped or held by men. Whether I’d enjoy a woman’s contact is uncertain. I questioned my sexuality in HS, and I know I am not comfortable around woman friends. I don’t like them too close because… idk, I feel some sort of tension. So I push them all away.
I’m struggling with menopause and a lot of mental stuff, too, so I’m trying hard to see what’s “true,” and what’s just symptomatic of my anxiety and depression.
I’ve been married nearly 30 years, and I’m 48. We have two kids (20+ and 9). I know every boy I ever dated had to coerce me past kissing. After awhile, I just started putting out because it was “what was expected,” and while I definitely find a small group of men attractive, mostly I’m “eh” about them.
With women, I feel intensely awkward, uncomfortable, self conscious. I tend to avoid maintaining friendships beyond just chit chat.
Does that resonate with anyone?