Okay. So my partner and I have been dating for three and a half years, and due to a job I just had to move a couple hours away from her until her lease ends. It should only be about five months, nothing crazy.
I’m a person that LOVES to help my partner. Chores, errands, making her a coffee every morning, the works. If she needs help or wants my company I’m always there.
In the past she’s made comments about how she’s never going to find someone who is as helpful as I am, and she’s listed some of her favorite things about me are the things I do for her.
One thing to note is I’m a very emotional-based person while she’s more logical. I’m okay with getting sappy and using words of affirmation, while she’s doesn’t like being sappy and struggles with giving words of affirmation.
Well I moved a little over a week ago. Before leaving, the only comments she had made about missing me were that she was losing the person who would go shopping with her and things of that matter. I kind of told her I wasn’t loving that language, but it infers that my value to her was more so in the things I do rather than the person I am, and she assured me that she loves me for so much more than that.
Since moving though, the only comments she’s made about missing me or how this may be hard are “oh I just had to make myself my morning coffee.” Or “I just had to do my laundry and feed the cats all by myself.” (Said jokingly, she is capable of doing these things, but always liked that she had the help.).
I’m just worried because meanwhile I miss HER, I miss cuddling with her and seeing her smile. We were in a relationship where we saw each other 5 days a week for the last three years with the exception of vacations or illness, so being apart is very new. I don’t know if it’s because she doesn’t like sappy, so the easiest way to say she misses me is by mentioning the lose of physical actions, but so far it just seems like she’s noticing the lack of help I provide rather than the lack of my presence.
How do I approach this? I’m a really anxious person, so it’s easy for me to get worried about things that are maybe in my head.