Partner doesn't want help but im really worried and don't know what to do
Trigger Warning: suicide, possible abuse mention and past SA mention.
This is a throwaway, as my partner knows my reddit
So myself and my partner have been together for nearly 4 years both have bpd. Mine is more the quiet bpd while hers is the opposite.
Lately, she has become extremely suicidal. The other week, after an argument over something objectively very small, but I know first hand that even the smallest things can feel massive. After the argument, she stormed out and walked 3 miles while walking into traffic. I only knew this after, I was calling her repeatedly (I know, not the best but I was really worried about her) and when she'd occasionally pick up, she would say things like "youre gonna feel so guilty when im dead". After her mom found her, got her home and eventually got her to stay at her moms for that night, she would text me things like that im the reason she want to die, that i should kill myself and horrible things like that i deserved to be r*ped and shes glad that I have an ill parent and a dead grandparent. She came home later that night and said that she was going to kill herself by the end of the year. She'd try and live for me and her mom but when shes done, she'll do it.
She doesn't want help, said that if we call anyone to get her help like police or crisis team that she'll kill herself sooner or even right before anyone comes to get her and in front of us, . She has a routine appointment with her mental health team but has said she'd just lie. We've offered private therapy but is refusing. She says her mind is made up and we can't stop her.
I really dont know what to do. Even if there's no suggestions on how to help, just getting it off my chest it nice because im not meant to say anything.I do feel guilty about talking about it but I just have no idea on what to do. If anyone has any suggestions id be very grateful, and im sorry if this isn't the right platform, I dont know where to post