Hi guys! I’ve been in a relationship with my girlfriend for about 2 years now. We are newly long distance which has been kind of hard, but we’ve been doing our best to work things out and be present in each other’s lives to the best of our abilities. I am in grad school and she is not currently working right now. Recently I feel like my girlfriend is starting to get extremely irritated by things I do or don’t do and I have tried talking to her about this and often times it results in her getting upset, taking time, then moving on from the conversation.
A little backstory: I went out to dinner with my sister, her kids, and her brother and law and their kids and there was about 12-15 people at dinner. The service was extremely slow (the time to take our orders, bring the food out, grab the check, check on the table, etc), everyone was just talking and having a good time, and we got dessert. I was at dinner for approximately 4 hours. I come from a big family and it was a school night and my nieces are a lot younger. My girlfriend was upset that I didn’t text her throughout the dinner with my family which I understand. I thought I responded back to her text, but I forgot to hit send and assumed she was busy or didn’t want to talk to me. About a week later, I went over my sister’s house for dinner and only stayed about 2 hours because she was getting my nieces ready for bed and I didn’t want to intrude or get my nieces riled up. My girlfriend said that the fact I stayed for 2 hours for dinner while the week prior I was at dinner at the restaurant for 4 hours, was suspicious and fishy. Both times I was genuinely having dinner with my family.
Today on the phone with her (we facetime everyday for long hours due to long distance) and I took one of my finals. She texted me really nice and supportive messages earlier in the day and when I started talking about the final or anything else going on she kind of got quiet and I asked if everything was okay. She kept saying that everything was fine and I told her how sometimes I feel like whenever I tell her about things that doesn’t pertain to our relationship or something like that, she gets quiet and it seems like she’s upset. She got annoyed with what I was saying and denied it and I dropped it. Within the conversation I asked if I should go home to see my mom for mother’s day. She asked when my final was and I told her it was next week and she scoffed and said I told her that it was this week. I told her I’m sorry and that I thought I sent her the schedule or verbalized it and apologized for misspeaking then she got annoyed. I mentioned that I wanted to have my 2 friends over for dinner because it’s one of their birthdays and I told her how I wanted to have them over and cook for them, and she got mad and said that when I told her about the call with my friend, I mentioned going to a restaurant not having them over for dinner. I apologized and told her that none of the plans were solidified and regardless we are just having dinner together and I let her know what I texted my friends, the date, the time, etc. She got mad about all of this and said “Idk who you’re relaying this information to, but it’s not me and I don’t wish to be mixed up with them.”
This is like the third time she has alluded to me cheating and I genuinely have not and would never talk to someone else or cheat on her. She knows my feeling regarding cheating and I am so confused. We are on the phone all the time and she knows what I am doing 24/7. I do not know what to do. I have tried reassuring her and telling her that I love her, that I see a future with her, tell her how much I miss her everyday, etc. but that doesn’t seem good enough. Can someone help me navigate how to fix this situation?