AITA Dont want to accept free holiday with my father
My family has been to Fiji a bunch of times together. My granny has just passed and my dad is getting sentimental, wanting to go back. His health is declining rapidly and he cannot walk without aid and is usually in a wheelchair. He is also recieving helo from ndis and has a carer who he is quite fond of. Context.
My dad asked if my son (nerodivergent/8yo) and I (f37) would come with him and basically wheel him round/care for him during the trip. The deal is he pays for the 2 to 3 weeks accomodation in return for driv8ng and getting him round.
Sounds good in theory. The issue is that due to his health and just basic demeanour he goes into fits of rage. When I visit his place and I know he's in a mood just looking for someone to attack verbally, I just quietly tell my son in the other room that his grandad is in a mood and we are going to leave without saying too much. And thats what we do.
On occasion, with hospital visits, strong medications etc he has experienced psychosis and has almost become physical in his rage towards both myself and his late mother.
Last trip we went on he was screaming that I was a "f,ing b!!ch" when I got gastro and ran out of toilet paper so started using tissues.
I dont want to be stuck in another country, walking on eggshells or having to protect my son from his wrath. I also dont want to waste time or airfares to be abused and end up having a horrid time.
I dont believe im the asshole but how do I tell him? He doesnt realise or choose to see how intolerable and just damn scary he can be.