This is about the beauty of finding refuge in the truth of loss in an undying world

The Beauty of Vaporized Bands in an Undying World

• I bow to You,the Lords of bursting dreams,what is the use of victory when we have not accepted our losses,the promise death is more persistent than an ever-moving snail watching us,it's truth stays awake when we sleep and play.
• Before in this life,I had played on a swing aiming for the distant rainbow thinking that if I had jumped off how it would be to land on the rainbow's rays if it was a cartoon,an untamed mind is like a slide
  • In Your knowledge rests the vapor of all things of which lights hits him and likewise You seeing the beauty of these things has made life magical,the sins of two brothers fighting with sticks is illuminated by Your sight and by Your compassion You see the sanctity of both,ahhh... Our blessing in an undying world is that You see the unseen beauty of the things we see,You see Our beauty as You see Yourself O Lords!
• I honor You,the rainbow's bands are like the garlands of the TriLoka and wormholes are like the TriLokas veins,but above all the forms of Hari's breath are Your Souls.
• Twirling with our arms below You; men,demons,devas and animals swim below You in a cosmic dance,there is no divinity without me to praise You and You to find beauty in it.
• The beauty of day is not clear as the blue sky blossoms like a morning glory in the mornings glory covering the pains of our world,but at night we let the truth inside that nothing belongs to us except for our sins and merits upon the night-pearl whose bright face reminds of death
  • O Lords,the flames of a pot burn hot unlike the dreams of a rainbow,it is sinful before You to wish for another world while denying our world to others just as bathing in Your compassionate nectar has made it clear that another world is never my world. Lamentations written in golden plates are worth nothing when they land on our face like gold coins and unlike our fantasies of gold coins the truth of chocolate coins is that they are beautiful to men and ants alike.
  • Your glory is beyond our words just as the violence of pearls are alien to those who wear them and Your glory is Your eternal silence is Your Supremacy,as the voice of the Liberated would rupture our world by the magnitude of Your glory
• Seeking Your radiance,I bow down to You who have not shed Your last 4 hairs,O Victors! Your beauty invalidates the sharpness of the sharpest sword as a fool swings at the air to kill the winds of death,but in truth a soft cloth is more pleasing to us than the pangs of violence
  • All things can be given and taken but what is never given is our own exertion for the betterment of the world,I pray for the decay of a the fantastic dream and the acceptance of Saturn's rings who are more sacred the rings of a wife,for one can beat their children and the other spins beautifully while both are reduced to ashes
  • What a woe it is to never to swept away from the dream of such a silly life!
  • What a pain it is to flee from the promise of death when the grasp of a better world rests in our hands!
• The Divorce from the dream is sweet like nectar and to put the foolish world on trail for it's sins is beyond sweet,the joy of it's atoms to decay is indeed glorious,deaths comes to the martyr and tyrant alike yet the joy of a martyr is that the devas watch his death from the heavens
  • O Vitaraaga,may we shine for You,there is nothing You offer us yet we offer You our own exertion,nothing is Our wealth when saturn bursts like a bubble and like a bubble it is incapable of holding back our pain,if pain is eternal we can laugh at it while our forms melt into an eternal ocean,ah the beauty of a rainbow is formed the glowing light of the sun and steaming pots,ah glory of vaporized bands!
  • O Vitaraaga may I be given the blessing of purging these red strings of fate from my Soul,may I never wish for another life as hell has life and life is hell to those who pleasures are taken from.- I bow the Lords of bursting dreams,You have spend for the Salvation of all. In a world where the resultant of all things is knowledge,I only desire the confession of these things
• I bow the Lords of bursting dreams,You have spent all for the Salvation of all. In a world where the resultant of all things is knowledge,I only desire the confession of these things

In enjoy things like sleeping on the floor but when I do that,it becomes painless to me. I enjoy pain so it's not a punishment,I dont do drugs or party,there is no penance as a Sravak that is goodly painful to me.

I justify morality by knowing what is wrong,I cannot emotionally relate to others nor do I need to. The Siddhas watch the holocaust and do nothing and feel bliss,I can not find pain in my own suffering and I think the idea of others' suffering is nothing to me but I give bugs water on daily walks as I value life more than death

I do not know if it is moral to respect others' pain,we are entrusted with the means of living,not luxury. I cannot relate to them,my own pain is nothing,I enjoy pain. I think the most beautiful things in the worst of things

I am tempted to believe that Lord Mahavira did not feel sad when others suffered but rather he thought about how to fix it.

My morality is not for your emotions,it is for all life. No,I am not depressed,I am quite happy. No I am not a sadist,I respect all life and I act to uphold it as best as I can.

A nurse in a hospital wants to not see their patients again as he wants them to live in peace,abusive parents love their child as they cannot live without them. I do not love nor do I hate(well,maybe a little bit).

Can I just abandon the notion of caring about the others and just have compassion for the world,I have almost no capacity to empathize with others,my Lords know this as do I.

Also,HOW CAN I DO TAPAS AS A SRAVAK,WHAT IS THE MOST HARSHEST TAPAS(I dont watch TV/drunk sugar)?

I wrote this about the season of fall,it is about the ways we can die and the beauty of shedding raags

To Risahbha Lord!

The Orange-Tainted Glow in an Undying World

• O Lords,I bow before Your glow as Your immaculate Doctrine has made You God of this ocean, and Your Glow has uprooted Your desire for it while below the the world grows sprouts and sprouts again,the beauty of mud is made dry by the heat of our sins and by Your glow is made flat and beautiful
• Is a drained ocean worth truly evil when it is easier trek in a desert,or better yet is it easier to survive the ocean's sinful echoes who screams sound like excitement but recoil back as pain,yet the echos of Your breath vaporizes the tides of Karmas at Your feet.... A dirty path is divine in a swampy forest run by fate
  • Ensnared in a massive ocean whose floor is covered in seaweed and trees and is overrun with vines,the winds are loud and and the bushes are soft,loud and soft,loud and soft! Your beauty is felt loudly and Your softness tastes like a faint morning mist. Till the world is dry and tilling' the world thinking of the crackling embers of Your undying heart
• The world sits next to me like a mother foolishly ranting about her children in a pumpkin patch,how sinful is it to not conceal my smile as she fails the conceal the glowing sun behind her? Your radiance is brighter than the sun and unlike the sun Your glory shines everywhere while we recollect our horrors!
  • Wasted time is only as useful as you learn from it,haha,sitting in an eternal ocean is only made horrible by not thinking of Liberation,and the beauty of my life is to think of You!
• Forgive us when our eyelids are painted like clowns and own pumpkin Idols fail to contain the slightest Essence of Your Immaculate glory. Our ignorance blossoms in hot and cold while we flee from fate just as eyelids close in snowstorms and sandstorms alike,if a heart exists as a basket let me hold You in my heart as You have us under Your glow
• Under Your glow we all go like whiners and winners!
  • Playing in the pumpkin patch in the days of yore,do we explode like pumpkin cannons firing pumpkins into the air while the tides of times cause us to scatter like leaves.
  • Under Your radiance the orangeness of fall will blow us away,apart we will go like a pile of leaves
  • Under Your radiance like a soft sky tainted with an orange glow,there are many shades of day and many shades of life
• Perhaps we are fired into RV trailers upon which we splatter,do we ever take joy in the loss of homes,is it better to live inside or out,perhaps forgotten photos of ourselves fall down while critters crawl inside
  • Loss is only as funny as others enjoyment in it while we sit till we are faintly touched by the influx of karmas touching my legs like gusts of wind tickling our feet
• Thinking of You while smiling with checks tainted by Your glow,perhaps I taste like a tasty treat to those who said I was sweet
  • Candy corn chewed by men or melted for ants,death is a promise and life is not. A sweet life is less sacred than a holy death
• Thinking of You smiling,thinking of an ant's plight as he desires resting under a wishing tree,I wonder about what the ant thinks:
  • Perhaps he thinks: "In a world of undying sunlight I desire clarity while dying".
  • And to that I gift him a smile before I give him water and shade
• Thinking of You praying for our Liberation,dewdrops and grass,water and blades
• Finding peace in the blowing of leaves walking past the blowing of leaves
  • Death is a promise as is the Darshan of life,like fungus and roots,men and frogs
  • Death is a promise,upholding life is not

Regarding those blind with faith whose blessing is they cannot see the pain they cause in the world,my supremacy over the foolish is that I am not foolish and that I can reason with that without resorting to emotions of which they seem to not value,that the validity of a truly moral law is that a Soul who carries is that his sight encompass the essence of all things while the Absoluteness of it's validity of this law would be applicable over all things,and the antipode of this being a falsely moral law whose validity would not encompass the sum of all things. Thus it is the virtue of a Soul of who sin seems to ever tied is that he learns from it and ties his own from the means of sin,thus to strip the myth of a sinner of emotional baggage kills the root of the the sin and the sin itself

Thus I must ask these:

1. Does Darshan mean faith or view,if so please explain why(does Darshan seem to mean "blind faith" in later literature or newer literature)
2. (if you awnsered yes to question 1) Do the Siddhas "have faith" that they exist? That is such a dumb question ask,at least I don't have to answer it as I don't think Darshan means "faith".
3. Why do texts written many years after Akaranga Sutra read nothing like Akaranga Sutra? Lord Mahavira was Perfect,later day people aren't.
4. How do modern monks handle sectarian differences,is there any hardline intellectual Jain Gacchas that critically read their own scripture and are actually interested in Truth(probably Svetamber Taranpanth but I would have to read what they say).
5. Yes I believe in the all-seeingness of Lord Mahavira,should I deny that later-day scripture says some weird stuff,how did Hemacandra learn like 1700+ years after Lord Mahavira learn that Kumarapala was a Chakravartin and why didn't Kumarapala like take over the world if he was a Chakravartin?