u/Impressive_Tart_5167

I was talking to a girl for about a month. Things seemed good - we joked, flirted, had calls. She told me I was handsome, sweet, funny. She rarely initiated conversations and said it was because she was "afraid of getting on my nerves."

She has low self-esteem, was fighting with a friend, and once mentioned a guy she "used to like."

In our last conversation, I forgot about her competition, then remembered and wished her good luck. She replied: "Damn, your memory is one pixel."

I didn't respond to that. The next day, I found out she had blocked me.

Question: Why would someone act like this - calling you perfect, then blocking you over something so small? And if she unblocks me (she's done it before), what could possibly be going on in her head?

I’ve always felt like my perception of the world is different from most people’s. While others look at the surface, I automatically try to find the hidden structure - in people, systems, thinking, technology. Because of this, my interests look chaotic: psychology, IT (backend), Linux, philosophy, religion, human behavior. But for me, all of it is connected.

I analyze not only the world around me but also myself. Why do I think the way I do? What actually shapes a personality? Sometimes it feels like a part of me is constantly watching from the outside - like I’m both the participant and the observer of my own life.

I’m good at grasping ideas quickly, but there’s a downside: I get stuck in analysis. I can spend hours building mental models, searching for meaning, imagining the future - but I don’t always turn that into action. It’s a constant conflict between potential and discipline.

I care about critical thinking and meta-thinking because I don’t just want to take information at face value. I want to see where the truth is, where the illusion is, where society is influencing me, and where my own thoughts actually begin.

But my main problem right now is energy and routine.

I have periods of deep focus where I understand complex things in one day. For example, one weekend I rewatched a backend tutorial, fully understood it, wrote the code, and the next day I explained it to my teacher - he was shocked because until then he thought I barely understood anything.

But on regular days, after school, my brain turns into mush. I come to IT classes completely drained, and nothing sticks. Not because I’m stupid - because I have no resources left.

My current daily routine: English in the morning (I’m B1, almost B2), then school - and that’s it. No energy left for IT.

I know I want to grow in IT to a senior level. I know that English and technical skills are the foundation. I can even mentally picture a future where I deeply understand complex systems.

But between that vision and reality - there’s a gap.

I don’t want to postpone everything until summer because I know “I’ll start later” is a trap. But right now my brain is so overloaded that I can’t even force myself to take micro-steps.

This isn’t a question of how to become smarter. It’s a question of how to restore the ability to act when you feel that “I don’t want to, but I do want to” - and your system is just frozen.

I don’t need a motivational pep talk. I need a practical algorithm for an overloaded brain that works under low-energy conditions.

Any real advice from people who’ve been through this would mean a lot.

I’m a teenager who tends to think deeply and analyze almost everything - myself, other people, ideas, and how things work. My interests are mainly programming, psychology, technology, space, critical and meta thinking and understanding systems rather than just surface-level facts.

Because of this way of thinking, I often end up reflecting a lot on who I am and what kind of person I’m becoming. I don’t really think in a “fixed identity” way - it feels more like I’m constantly observing and adjusting myself based on what I learn and experience.

In the past, I leaned toward being emotionally detached and self-centered. I tried to see that as being “strong” or independent, but over time I started to realize it was more of a defense mechanism than actual strength. Right now, I feel like I’m in a transition phase. I’m slowly becoming more social and trying to understand people instead of just analyzing them from a distance. At the same time, I still value independence and deep thinking, and I don’t want to lose that part of myself.

For me, the future isn’t something I see clearly defined. It feels more like something I’m actively building through the way I think, learn, and change over time.