u/IndependenceJumpy349

Hi everyone. I’m mostly posting because I feel really confused and honestly kind of discouraged after multiple appointments with my doctor, and I wanted to know if anyone relates to this experience.

I’m currently on Vyvanse (50mg right now, thinking of trying 60mg before deciding anything else). The thing is… I do think it works to some extent. I’m functional overall. I go to school, work, go to the gym consistently, track my symptoms, try to maintain routines, sleep, nutrition, etc. I’m not expecting medication to magically make me perfectly productive.

But I still feel like I’m manually steering my brain all day long.

The best way I can describe it is that I constantly have to “pull” my focus back manually. For example:
- I’ll sit in my car outside the gym for 20 minutes unable to transition inside even though I WANT to work out.
- After the gym, I’ll sit in the parking lot doing random things instead of just driving home.
- Making breakfast feels like internally narrating every step to myself so I don’t get pulled into another thought/task halfway through.
- I can redirect myself, but it feels effortful every single time.

It’s like there’s this invisible friction between tasks/transitions that I can’t explain properly.

The frustrating part is that I’ve actually been on Concerta before, and while I couldn’t tolerate the side effects at all, I remember feeling closer to a “baseline” where attention/transitioning felt more automatic and less manually controlled. Not perfect. Just… easier. Less friction.

I’ve talked to my doctor about this multiple times, but I always leave appointments feeling like maybe I’m expecting too much from medication, or maybe I’m just not trying hard enough, or maybe I don’t actually have ADHD at all. I KNOW he’s probably just trying to set realistic expectations, but somehow the conversation keeps turning into me feeling like I have to justify why daily life feels hard.

And honestly, that part has been emotionally exhausting.

I understand ADHD meds won’t make me perfectly focused or productive. I still expect to self-regulate. But I thought medication was supposed to reduce some of the “friction,” and I’m not sure I’m really getting that with Vyvanse.

Has anyone else experienced something similar?
Especially:
- feeling “functional” overall while still feeling cognitively exhausted from constantly redirecting yourself
- doing okay on Vyvanse but still struggling heavily with transitions/initiation
- tolerating methylphenidate meds better cognitively but worse physically
- switching from Vyvanse to Foquest after a similar experience

I’m trying to figure out if:

1. I should try increasing Vyvanse one more time first
2. This is just a realistic amount of residual ADHD symptoms
3. Or if maybe my brain simply responds better to methylphenidate-based meds despite the side effects

Would really appreciate hearing from anyone who relates. :’)