u/Independent8320

A little background, my friend, who I'll call P, have been friends since second grade, she's always been the pick me type when it came to her and guys, saying how theyre flirting with her when all they do is walk by. If things didnt go her way, she would throw a big tantrum about it. If she caused a fight or hurt someone she would put herself as the victim and completely ignore you until you apologized even if you didn't do anything. This is important for later. She is getting married to a military guy, who we'll name K, she's known the man for only 6 months now and seen each other one time in person. They're getting married in August and P invited my boyfriend (K's best friend) and I to their honeymoon for a group trip. We promptly said yes only because P said that we would be splitting costs on everything that we needed like the bnb, groceries, and gas. Boyfriend is in college and I have been taking classes to get my realtor license and we dont have the spare money to do a big trip. P and K understood and we all planned an eight day trip an hour away from the church that they are getting married at. P picked the BnB, we agreed on the grocery list which was a little over $500, and how the money for gas would work. All in all everyone would have to save $1000 each for splitting everything and spending money.

That was 2 months ago, a few days ago my boyfriend informs me that P wants to do a hotel instead of a bnb and wants to do the honeymoon in a whole other state, the drive was only about 2 hours but where she wanted to go was a massive city and every parking spot had to be paid after a certain amount of time depending on where you park. I told my boyfriend that we could do a hotel but she needs to understand that they won't have a kitchen like a bnb and the fast food price would go up since we wouldn't be able to make our own food, mind you, when originally planning the trip I set the fast food budget at $800 for the 8 days and she yelled at me for it, not understanding that it was a budget, not the actual cost. My boyfriend informed her and she got defensive saying how there's hotels with kitchens (those were in a whole other state and costed over $2000). P then proceeded to go back to searching for bnbs in that same city (since you had to be 21 or older to book a hotel), and found 2 separate bnbs that were kids themed. P sent a link to my boyfriend and he sent it to me to look at and for the 8 days it costed almost the same price as the original bnb that P looked at. I told him I wasn't paying almost $2000 for a bnb that we would hardly be in except for at night and found a bnb that was 20 minutes from the area she chose, the bnb also costed $700 for the 8 days. After my boyfriend sent her the link to the bnb I found (she's been ignoring me when i send her messages, she'll read it but not respond), she completely ghosted him. After a few hours I message her about the trip and she messages in the group chat the whole plan. I go into more detail about it, asking if we're still splitting costs on the groceries and trying to figure out why we're doing a city trip instead of the cheaper option and P starts yelling at me that it's her honeymoon, K then jumped into the argument and started yelling at me for bringing up the old trip and that they can plan whatever they wanted since it's their honeymoon and would inform my boyfriend and i on what the plan is when they get it planned.

The reason she wanted to do the city in another state was because she wanted to go shopping the whole time, doing separate bnbs so her and K can gigity the whole time, and buying house stuff even though they haven't been approved of base housing yet, let alone applied for it. I told my boyfriend that I dont want go if all we do is stay inside because we wont have the spare money to go shopping the whole time and everything else costs money, i also mentioned to him that if i wanted to stay inside i could've done that for free at home. The original plan had nothing but free stuff like swimming, fishing, trails, and fairs. So it was a major difference in spending wise.

I don't want to be at their honeymoon because all they'll do is gigity and shop and I dont want to intrude on their honeymoon, even though P invited us, and we can't afford the extra spending. I also dont want my boyfriend to feel like he has to choose between his best friend or his girlfriend, so am i overreacting for not wanting to go on their honeymoon with them anymore?