My girlfriend and I have been together for 10 years and lived together for 8. Recently, she began playing a role-playing game all day, every day. This became a constant source of conflict, and we had multiple fights because she was prioritizing the game over our relationship. We had already been fighting due to financial difficulties and stress, but her gaming became a major red flag for me, especially when I saw their characters 'staring' at each other in-game. She said it was nothing serious and it's just a game. Lot of fights happened after that and we eventually decided to take a break to give each other space. Three days later, I apologized for my mistakes, but she told me she couldn't continue the relationship because she was tired of the constant fighting. She then admitted she loves the man from the game, describing it as an emotional affair and an escape from reality. She claims he understands her perfectly and was there for her when she needed support. She showed me text messages of "babe I love you, I will be naked for you," "I wish we were at a beach together naked kissing and making out." She even called this man to prove that he is real. I didn't say anything because I felt like I will do something stupid.
I was devastated and felt suicidal upon hearing this. I later discovered that this man is married with two children (Married for 14 years). My girlfriend claims he is willing to divorce his wife for her. He is financially stable and owns business. I tried to explain to her that this might just be a fantasy, and because I still love her, I told her I am willing to forgive her and move past this. I couldn't move on because I still really love her.
Recently, I found the profile of the man and his wife. I am struggling with whether I should tell his wife the truth. I feel guilty because I was verbally abusive and toxic during the last few months, and I feel responsible for driving her toward someone else. However, it feels unfair that I am suffering alone while she is happy. What makes me so angry and depressed is that she seems happy every day and is constantly giggling. It hurts to see her like this, especially since we’re moving out soon. All of this happening, I still told her to come back to me and I am here. I am willing to take therapy and do couple therapy as well.
It's difficult because his wife is unemployed, and I feel like I'm jeopardizing a family. However, if he was willing to jeopardize my relationship, he should be prepared to lose his own.
Help please.