headmate seemingly forced me to have a breakdown in front of our friends instead of letting me hide it?
I could be completely misinterpreting this but here's what happened:
we were at our friend's house with a couple of friends, we have a headmate who seems to carry a lot of our abandonment issues, which are severe
I was fronting and hanging out like I usually do, then apparently we started tearing up out of nowhere, I didn't even realise until one of our friend's pointed it out and asked what's wrong.
it was only after I was asked I felt the unique feeling we get when our abandonment issues happen, it was deep and I knew that I wouldn't have been able to hold things back once they started, like a leak in a dam.
I tried to get up and leave to go to the bathroom to hide what was coming next like I usually do without issue, but this time I had no control over our legs, I couldn't move them at all, it's as if the headmate wanted them to watch it?
eventually I managed to stand up for a second and then I immediately fell back down on the seat, and then after that the dam broke, we had the full breakdown that was more severe and lasted longer than I thought it would have been
I'm not one to express negative emotions in front of most people, the only person I ever really have is our best friend who was also there. so I felt completely vulnerable and I was terrified
my point being, is it possible for a headmate/alter to do this? or am I reading too much into this? why might the headmate of done this? (I've tried communicating with them about this but I haven't really gotten an answer)