How to get attention from the one you like ?
I am a 22-year-old guy and I have never been in a relationship or dated anyone.
All my life, I have been that friend people describe as "cute," "a good guy," or "his future partner will be blessed to have him." But somehow it never becomes anything more than that.
I have always had female friends since school. I am a socially awkward person and not a very good communicator. At first, I don't know what to say. But once I become close to someone, I don't shut up. I overshare, become vulnerable, and show my real self. I don't pretend to be some super confident guy.
Twice( including the recent one )I fell in love with close friends . The problem is that I don't know how to get attention on myself. I don't know how to text properly, and when I do text, I somehow make it awkward. I am not good with humor, flirting, banter, or playful conversations. Even if they text me i don't know how to keep it playful
When I fall in love with someone, I put in 100% effort. I care deeply and give everything I have emotionally. But the people I put 100% effort into never seem to care about me the same way.
What confuses me is that there have been girls who liked me when I wasn't even trying that hard. But the moment I really like someone and put in effort, it never works out.
I have friends who can talk to almost any girl. They know how to keep conversations interesting, make people laugh, flirt naturally, and girls become attracted to them. I honestly don't know how to be like that.
I feel like my biggest problem is that I don't know how to talk. I don't know how to keep attention. I don't know what to talk about. I don't know how to be flirty, funny, or interesting without making things awkward.
Right now there is this woman that I like. I know I am in love with her. I think she kind of knows it too. She has even said that I am her type and that I am a good guy. But again, nothing happens. It has always been like this since school.
I feel like there is a huge competition between men when it comes to girls, and I don't know how to stand out. I don't know how to get attention without pretending to be someone else. I don't want to cross boundaries, and I don't want to confess too and get hurt again.
I genuinely want to know: what am I doing wrong? Has anyone else been like this and figured it out? How did you learn to talk, flirt, create attraction, and get attention from someone you genuinely like?
Any advice would be appreciated.