so for context i am a 25 year old nb with autism. and i had a best friend that i had met in highschool. met him in the starting year and we were extremely close, house visits, i knew his family and he knew mine, the whole thing.
we had one small spat, when i was 13 so near 2 years of knowing him. the fight was essentially, a mutual friend of ours had said we ‘acted like an old married couple’ i at this point was fairly certain i was queer in some capacity. and thought it’d be funny to continue the narrative as a bit. i meant nothing malicious with it at all. since he had made similar comments when we were hanging out and thought he’d find it funny. anyway, i had said to that mutual friend that my friend was gay, but i didn’t say it with much conviction, it was quite obvious i was joking. the mutual friend laughed and we moved on. anyway, that started rumours which then got back to my friend. when he found out, he screamed at me, called me names and we fell out. months later he left school.
fast forward years later, just after graduation from highschool, he had made contact via a youtube comment on a video of mine. just a funny moments thing. he said ‘i admit this made me laugh’ with a time stamp. through that we reconnected. one of our mutuals must have showed him my vids. so for the most part we were right back to how we were. he explained that the reason he freaked out was because of his family. they apparently wouldnt have taken to the news of him being gay well. but at the same time, hes literally not?? so i understand his worry, but i do think he overreacted.
now enter my friends brother. he was 2 years older than me and my friend. he was nice enough, if a little socially inept. i was around 14 when i got diagnosed with autism. and the reason me and his brother started talking was one cus he was his brother and had shared a room with my friend at one point. so he was hard to ignore. but also because he was also autistic, and he was the first person outside of my own family that was. so we talked sometimes, and thats about as close as i ever got with him.
now, heres the situation that has me a bit conflicted. me and my friend were now 22/23. parties, dating, the whole thing. one day his brother started acting a bit weird with me, saying little comments, snide things. at the time i didnt work, and he never let me forget it. he would bring it up any chance he got and would insult me all the time. then my friend had been working in some job and met a girl. everything was completely innocent with my friend and her, they were coworkers and nothing more. but my friends brother took a real shine to her. by this point he was 25 i believe. which ordinarily would be fine. but she was 17.
obviously had a big issue with this. i told my friend this and he told me 'he's never had something like this cus of his autism, you should just let him have this'