How do I get the ball rolling?
I've known I'm trans mtf for over a year and a few months (I've questioned it for years but I only came out last year year my friends in January ish).
But I haven't really done much about it at all apart from 2 of my friends changing pronouns for me, name wise I'm not even sure about, I like my name as it is but it's also not a very feminine/unisex name and It's a whole thing for a different story
But I was out today with my university flatmates, 2 of which are girls and are really nice people, and I was just sat there like what am I even doing here.
I know this is probably a common thing maybe, but I wish I was them. They were having a lot more fun than anyone on the table together and like among other obvious things, I wish I was born a girl.
Like I said, I came out to my friends last January and like 80% of them know
(the rest are either not close enough that I ever brang it up or I think it's best I don't tell them that. Specifically one of them but he's a nice guy apart from that)
My friend asked me recently to about any updates, shes really nice about that. I feel like I'm lying to her sometimes, she'll ask about it and I'll say nothing new really, when in reality i haven't been trying to look at it and I'm just giving excuses like I've been putting it off? If that makes sense?
I want something to be actually new about it, like im actually trying
I've been busy with uni work so I've been saying oh I've been busy, when really I mean: I have no clue what I'm doing... as well also that but mostly the former.
I'm just tired of not knowing what to do
Sorry if this isn't that much information to go on
I just don't know what I'm doing, I've googled it tons of times and watched videos but I still don't know.
I get if this is too little of an explanation maybe (I have a tendency to ramble on in texts), all the other lgbtq people in my life are all really nice people and seem like they know what they're doing, I just dont know what else to say really
Thank you :)
I'm reading the prohibited post list thing and I think this ok, thank you