u/Intelligent-Pop852

Backstory. My daughter moved to a new middle school in 7th grade. We moved her from the best private school in our area, to a local Catholic school, because she was already burning out hard in 6th grade. She was staying up til midnight to maintain her grades being on the Dean’s list and doing multiple extracurricular activities: piano, ballet, and swimming. She was overworked and it was unhealthy. We wanted her to be a kid and enjoy the afterschool activities until she got to high school.

When she got to the new school, it was baffling to them why she would move from the best school to theirs. So then began the rumors. “She got kicked out for such and such reasons”.

Middle school sucks in general and kids can be mean. But my daughter hides it well. The other girls never wanted to include her in anything. She always tries to be outgoing, joining sports and clubs, but to just end up with more exclusion.

Well she just had an 8th grade awards ceremony and literally no one in her class cheered for her when she got her awards. It was so clearly intentional.

I’m not trying to impose my feelings on her. Being completely honest she is such a better person that I am, and I don’t know how to approach this topic when she’ll bring it up tomorrow. I don’t even know how to think about the topic because if I was in her position, I’d probably been in a few fights by now, with the way they’ve treated her. I don’t want to project my feelings or corrupt her. She’s pretty and smart and we come off well off. Clearly I want to tell her that they must be intimidated or threatened but I don’t want to say it, or have a more eloquent way to not say it.

Maybe it’s good that she seems like it doesn’t bother her. She keeps trying to fit in and keeps getting rejected and I want to tell her to not waste her time on being nice to them.

How do I navigate this topic with her?

Backstory. My daughter moved to a new middle school in 7th grade. We moved her from the best private school in our area, to a local Catholic school, because she was already burning out hard in 6th grade. She was staying up til midnight to maintain her grades being on the Dean’s list and doing multiple extracurricular activities: piano, ballet, and swimming. She was overworked and it was unhealthy. We wanted her to be a kid and enjoy the afterschool activities until she got to high school.

When she got to the new school, it was baffling to them why she would move from the best school to theirs. So then began the rumors. “She got kicked out for such and such reasons”.

Middle school sucks in general and kids can be mean. But my daughter hides it well. The other girls never wanted to include her in anything. She always tries to be outgoing, joining sports and clubs, but to just more end up with more exclusion.

Well she just had an 8th grade awards ceremony and literally no one in her class cheered for her when she got her awards. Killed me inside because I knew it was intentional.

I have my own issues and I’m not trying to impose it on her. Being completely honest she is such a better person that me and I don’t know how to approach this topic when she’ll bring it up tomorrow. I don’t even know how to think about the topic because if I was in her position, I’d probably been in a few fights by now, with the way they’ve treated her. I don’t want to project my feelings or corrupt her. She’s pretty and smart and we come off well off. Clearly I want to tell her that they must be intimidated or threatened but I don’t want to say it, or have a more eloquent way to not say it.

Maybe it’s good that she seems like it doesn’t bother her. She keeps trying to fit in and keeps getting rejected and I want to tell her to not waste her time on being nice to them.

I need advice on how to handle this conversation and mature advice on how to view her situation. My mom died recently and she was the only other person I could talk about these things with.

Please help