Sexual harassment by employee of store
I have been shopping at the same Asian grocery store since I moved to this area 6 years ago and always felt it was a safe space. I felt at home seeing others who looked like me and hearing the language of my childhood spoken around me. I loved leisurely wandering every aisle and seeing new products and old familiar items that allow me to connect with my culture. This area has a few other Asian grocers but they are not as close.
Two weeks ago, I noticed a lot of new staff I didn't recognize stocking shelves. As I was coming to the end of an aisle, an employee pushing a cart walked by and stopped in front of me blocking the end of the aisle. He looked at me hard, especially at my lower half, a smirk appeared on his face. I glared at him until he stopped and he moved on. I wore bike shorts and was starting to feel I shouldn't have worn them though I tell myself it doesn't matter. I texted husband about it, finished my shopping and left.
The next week I'm there again, in the vegetable section I recognize him. He pauses what he's doing and looks me up and down again. This time was not as long as last time. I stare at him until he stops and i leave the section. During the same trip, in a different part of the store, I see him with his cart in front of a stockroom door about 20ft away from me. When I notice him, he's stopped, staring at me. He stares at me for what feels like 15 seconds, then goes into the door. I text my husband again and am feeling so angry. I told him, "I forgot not to wear my bike shorts." Husband said I should be able to wear what I want. The rest of the shopping trip my head is on a swivel to see who's around me, feeling relived when it's not him.
My husband encouraged me to talk to the customer service desk. I work up the courage to talk to them. There's a bit of language barrier and my voice was shaky, eyes watery. I told them what happened, she calls over her manager and I tell him. He asks me to describe the man. I didn't have a great description. Manager told me he would check their cameras and talk to the employees that it's not ok to do that. They were very apologetic and nice about it. My favorite cashier happened to walk by, recognize me, and asked if something happened. I was glad they we're willing to do something at least. I felt proud I said something, I'm shy and it's not easy. I hope it will help other women he may be doing this to at the same store. I hope he won't know it was me who complained about him.
A day later, I'm still thinking about it. Sure, I could just go to a different store, but if I want cultural items my options are limited. Why should I drive further because of a stupid man? I feel somewhat foolish for saying anything, the guy didn't touch me or talk to me, so why am I feeling so bad over it? I feel like I'm overreacting. I don't even know why I cried in public, embarrassing. I'm so mad that this man took my comfort from me. Going forward, even if he is talked to by the manager, he's already made it awkward. Shopping there will never be the same as long as he works there. Writing this is my way of processing I suppose. I don't have many friends I talk to regularly.