u/JDis2COOL8156

I (57M), hid my best friend A's (41M) two children L(19M) and L(19F) from him for their entire lives, and allowed him to think they had died along with his wife after a violent domestic dispute with him. For context A and I were once coworkers and he was like a brother to me. I loved him. But over time he grew more and more distant not only from his job and upper management, but from me and his girlfriend as well. This ended in his lashing out violently several of our colleagues, and eventually myself. Following this dispute our organization was abruptly dissolved. After a confrontation between him and I that left him critically injured, I did what I thought best. He knew that his wife had died, and because of his violent tendencies I, as well as his former boss, believed that it was best that he didnt know that his twin babies had survived. I sent his son away to live with his closest living family. My boss (his organization now defunct) used his connections to send his daughter to grow up far away among the upper class of a different nation. Recently A's son L learned of this truth and was upset that I had not told him of this sooner. AITJ?

I (M40) recently learned that my son 'J' (M21), who I believed to be dead for several years, is alive. I am heartbroken because he is now involved in the leadership of multiple high level drug dealing and other criminal operations. My oldest ward 'D' (25) and I got into a scuffle with J, where D's leg was injured. Thankfully my butler and long time friend was able to tend to his injuries. However upon meeting J for a third time he explained to me that he was tired of living with me and always felt overshadowed by my success. He told me that he wished that I had done something drastic to bring his killer to justice. (his killer and I have had a volatile relationship and he has terrorized our family over the years) I told him that he wasn't mentally well and that he didn't really want this man killed. In the end after a heated debate we went out separate ways, seemingly for good. AITJ for not killing the man that I had believed to have killed my son?