AITA for telling my roommate's mom that she's been late on rent for 8 months and I've been covering the gap out of my own savings
me and my roommate (we'll call her J) have lived together for almost 3 years, used to be genuinely one of my closest friends. rent is $1850 split down the middle so $925 each. starting around december she started being "a few days late" which whatever, shit happens, but it became a pattern where she'd venmo me like $400 on the 1st and then trickle the rest in over like 3 weeks, sometimes not fully catching up before the NEXT month's rent was already due
i started just covering the difference to the landlord because our lease has both our names on it and i was terrified of a late fee or worse hitting my credit. i told myself i'd get reimbursed. mostly i did, eventually, but there's currently about $1400 i'm out that she keeps saying she'll "figure out this week"
her mom was in town last weekend and picked me up specifically to grab lunch, just the two of us, which has never happened before. she point blank asked me how J was doing money-wise because apparently J asked her for a loan and gave a reason that didn't add up with what her mom knew about her paycheck. i panicked and kind of froze and then just... told her. the venmo pattern, the $1400, all of it.
her mom was calm about it, said thank you for being honest, and left. i didn't hear anything for two days.
then J calls me screaming. apparently her mom confronted her, it turned into a huge fight about "irresponsibility," and J found out through her mom that i was the source. she's saying i had zero right to discuss her finances with anyone, that it's humiliating, that i "weaponized" her mother against her, and that our friendship is probably done.
i keep going back and forth. on one hand yeah, it wasn't really my story to tell unprompted like that, her mom asked ME, i didn't go seeking her out. on the other hand i'm not a bank and i've been quietly stressed about money that isn't mine to be missing for 8 months and nobody in my life knew that until this happened by accident.
my other friends are split. one said i should've just said "you'd have to ask her" and left it. another said J created this problem the second she involved her mom in a lie that happened to touch me.
aita for actually answering the question when it was asked directly