My 21st birthday is in a few days and my mom’s parcel from temu just came and she gave it to me saying its my birthday present. I started opening it and its mostly ai things like ai posters ai postcards and stuff so i wanted to be honest with her and explained to her that i dont like ai things and i probably wouldnt use them (im myself an artist as well ive drawn since i was a kid) and i also told her i was a little sad that my birthday gift was from temu and not from somewhere else. I was still opening the ones left in the package and she started crying saying “yeah im sad as well…” and quickly went up to her room and slammed the door. I tried to talk to her as she got up but she just left. AITA for being honest with her? Im glad she thought of me and wanted to get me something but i just wouldnt use them.
Update: This is not a financial issue, if it was i of course wouldnt have said anything because thatd be all she can afford but both of my parents work and theyre financially stable. The temu comment was because my mom knows i dont like temu, ive told this to her a few times before, explained why and even told her she also shouldnt use it but i cant control that, only thing i can control is that she knows i dont like it.
I just wish she wouldve asked me what i need or want (instead of her getting something i dont like and wont be used because i think thats a waste of time and money) i never ask for anything expensive anyway. Either way im going to apologise to her for hurting her feelings.
Update 2: I dont know why everyone is saying how i went about it was rude. I told her calmly and nicely that i didnt like them and explained why. I didnt scream, i didnt throw a tantrum, i didnt accuse her of anything. I obviously wouldnt have said anything if i knew she was gonna cry. I thought she would say something like “oh well, i wont get you these things again then.” I didnt make her upset on purpose. I just wanted to communicate like adults.
Oh also i apologised hours ago for hurting her feelings and said i didnt mean to hurt her but she didnt want to talk.
+ Here is a reply i sent to someone’s comment and i thought i should include on my post too:
We had a conversation about this the other day, i saw her looking at clothes on temu for me and they were not clothes that i would like and wear, and i told her to please just ask me what i like if she wants to get me a gift (i know i am not owed gifts, thats why i said if) because it would be a waste to spend money on things i wont like but she starts arguing back saying “if i ask you what u want or need, it wouldnt be a surprise would it?” So she is adamant on getting me things she knows i wont like (because she doesnt know what i like) but also would react the same way she reacted today when i would obviously not use them. I dont think im obligated to just wear things or use things that are not my style just because she bought them. I tried to explain all this to her and how it would be a waste and how it would be better to just buy me something i want if she really wants to buy me a gift but she just started pouting and acting all sad trying to make me feel guilty. When i said she was doing this she told me “shush, im a mom i can do that.” So yeah nicely informing her even before she gets something does not work.