i can’t do anything not even die
imma try to make this a lot shorter than my draft was so your essentially getting a tldr,
last december got fired on my birthday, have to rely on family to meet rent, start trying to make ends meet with blood and plasma donations while searching for a job, mom gets me a job on the other side of the country but has employ housing and food, almost instantly receive a crippling injury but company lets me keep working anyway, few months later while working for this company my depression comes back hard, my long distance partner starts to talk to me less, start closing off from friends, get moved into a different position that’s hella stressful, fight to get moved to any other position for two months, get moves to a worse one, best friend slowly losing the ability to deal with me at all, cant even make my family or friends happy, can’t cut myself, every time i try to die i get cold feet, every time i do anything remotely nsfw want to gut myself, anytime i talk to people wish i hadn’t any time i eat i can only take a few bites before wanting to vomit (i’ve been trying to gain weight cause im concerningly under weight), every time i walk i want to curl into a ball and cry, life has become a sysiphian task, only leave room for work and snacks, my time has just become videogames self hatred sleep and work.