coworker communication issues
So I’m about a year out since completing undergrad, and since then, I’ve been working at a small gym. I started out part time for a few months before getting promoted to full time. Other than the owner, I’m one of two full time salaried employees. We do regular meetings with the three of us to talk through strategic decisions, upcoming events, recent issues, etc. but recently another coworker has been joining in.
This coworker is one of the gym trainers and has been working there for ~7 years. They have gone through phases of being more and less involved in the business-side and are now getting more involved again. I can tell they’re a really smart and knowledgeable person, but they have a way of communicating that is very difficult to process. They often talk in circles around a topic for almost half the hour-long meeting and never get to the actual point or make much sense for the rest of us. And when someone else cuts in to give their opinion on something, sometimes they’ll talk over them and say something like “No, that’s not what I’m talking about/that’s not the point/etc.” or just add a point that feels entirely unrelated. It often feels like they’re connecting dots in their head and then skipping over half of them in their words, so everyone else is left confused and unable to make anything of the disjointed dots. Usually, I’m fine just sitting through those meetings without too much trouble, but when they are repeatedly interrupting my regular work tasks to have long conversations that go nowhere, I get a little frustrated. They also frequently send me long multi-paragraph text messages about work stuff outside of working hours. Once this happened on a Friday night, I saw it wasn’t urgent so I didn’t respond, and the moment I walked in to work after the weekend, I was met by them in my office asking my thoughts about it. It felt strange. I haven’t ever outwardly expressed my frustrations toward them and their communication style, but I have definitely thought about it.
This week, we had a casual staff bonding type event. This coworker brought in gifts as a surprise and gave everyone one thing without any explanation. They were mostly just small trinket type things you’d get at a dollar store, but the gift they gave me was a book about workplace communication and the power of a good conversation. I don’t really know what to make of this. Before they started joining the meetings, we had a conversation about how workplace communication and avoiding silos is important, so I guess the book could just be a nod to that? Or it could just be a “useful tool” for someone early in their career? But upon receiving the book, I couldn’t help thinking the worst—that they think *I’m* bad at communicating or the problem in those meetings. They didn’t say anything when they handed it to me or anything afterwards, so I just smiled and nodded and put it away in my desk.
I’m feeling pretty uncomfortable/unsettled by all of this, and I don’t really know what to do about it. In a way, my job title and being one of few full time employees hypothetically gives me some sway/power in the situation, but I’m so inexperienced being so early in my career while this coworker has been working here for a long time (and is much farther into their career/life in general). I guess I’m just looking for some outside thoughts on this and how others would react in a similar situation.
TLDR: I’m a new grad at my first full time job (very small business) with a coworker who has worked there much longer. They have a frustrating communication style that gets in the way of work productivity and gifted me a self-help style book about workplace communication. Not sure how to feel about it.