u/JustShutUpSummer

▲ 166 r/overheard

Hiking with teenagers

Went hiking with my cousin and his teenage friends and overheard them talking about their "addictions."

Cousin: Dude, if you're asking us if you're addicted to porn, then you probably are.

Friend 1: I don't know. I don't feel addicted.

Cousin: Okay, there's your answer.

Friend 1: How the fuck is that an answer?

Cousin: I don't fucking know. I'm not your dick.

Friend 2: How many times a day do you watch porn?

Friend 1: I don't know. Every time I wanna jerk off I guess.

Friend 2: Okay, so how many times a day do you jerk off?

Friend 1: Like... 4 times a day.

Cousin: Bruh. Your cock must be cooked.

Friend 2: Is it possible for you to jerk off less than 4 times a day?

Friend 1: Yeah. I only jerked off this morning, and I doubt I'll jerk off again today, especially if we're still going to the movies later tonight.

Friend 2: Do you feel the need to watch porn and jerk off while you're with us right now?

Friend 1: Come on bro. I didn't even think about that shit until we started talking about it.

Friend 2: Okay. Then you're probably not addicted to porn.

Cousin: You don't know that. You're not a doctor.

Friend 2: I never fucking said I was a doctor, but it takes more than just watching a lot of porn to actually be addicted to porn. Addiction takes over your life, and if mr 4 times a day over here was really addicted, then this motherfucker would've been nutting in the woods to some OnlyFans model by now.

Cousin: Did ChatGPT tell you that?

Friend 2: ChatGPT doesn't need to tell me how horny we are at 17. I figured that shit out all on my own.

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u/JustShutUpSummer — 6 days ago