IBM ASE relocation issue – really need guidance
Hey guys,
I really need some suggestions because honestly I feel completely lost right now.
I joined IBM as an ASE at the end of last year. My training was in Bangalore, and in February I got allocated to a project and relocated to Kolkata. I’m originally from Hyderabad.
Ever since I came here, my mental health has completely gone downhill. I know many people say “everyone adjusts eventually,” but I genuinely feel broken here.
I live alone. I don’t have friends here, nobody to talk to, nobody to even sit and eat with after work. Most days I just come back to my room and sit in silence for hours. Weekends feel even worse.
I cry almost every single day since I came to Kolkata. That’s how badly this loneliness and everything around me has affected me. I never thought I would become this mentally exhausted, but I honestly feel like I’m slowly losing myself here.
On top of this, there are family medical issues back home in Hyderabad, and being this far away makes me feel helpless all the time.
A few months ago, I spoke to my SDM about relocation to Hyderabad. He told me, “We’ll see in 5–6 months, and I’ll definitely help you.” Since then, I’ve been holding onto those words every single day and hoping that maybe by August I can finally relocate.
But when I discussed the same thing with my TL, he said I should stay in Kolkata for at least 1 year. Ever since hearing that, I’ve honestly been scared every day thinking what if I get stuck here till next year.
The thing is, I’m genuinely ready to do whatever it takes. I want to learn the project properly before August so that I can become independent and continue working from Hyderabad. I’m ready to spend extra hours, weekends, OT — anything. I’m not trying to escape work or responsibility. I just want a chance to survive mentally while also taking care of my family situation.
Right now I feel completely broken mentally. Every day I’m just hoping somehow August comes fast and my relocation gets approved. I honestly don’t think I can handle staying here till next year if they say no again.
I feel like my reason is valid because of my family medical issues, but I don’t know how these things work in corporate anymore.
If anyone from IBM or anyone who has faced something similar has advice about relocation, manager discussions, or how to handle this phase, please share it. I would really appreciate it.