Confused?
CW - talk of sex / sexual attraction
(22F) For starters, I'm absolutely positive that I'm a lesbian and have identified as such for most of my life, as I'm very sex- and romance-repulsed by men. However, I've also been questioning whether I'm asexual since middle school.I'm very romantically and aesthetically attracted to women, but I feel zero sexual arousal when seeing them naked or engaging in sexual activities outside of smut or books. (I'm also sexually repulsed by p0rn)
Essentially, women feel more like art to me.Despite never feeling sexual attraction or arousal, I wouldn't mind performing sexual acts with a woman I'm in a relationship with. (Likewise, I also wouldn't mind NEVER having sex in a relationship obviously) When I imagine sexual acts with a partner, it feels more like something I'd do for them rather than somthing out of my own initiative (not because i feel forced by society). I see myself enjoying it because of everything else it offers tho, closeness, kissing, hugging, warmth / emotional intimacy, and even the sensation of climaxing. I feel completely neutral about sex and women's bodies (in a sexual context) in general, neither feel exiting or "gross" but somthing that just exists. I already know on other subs people would call me demi or grey, but I honestly want a clear understanding of asexuality. Is this asexuality or am I an allo who needs an emotional connection before sex? Thank you