My life has fallen apart
Hi everybody,
I'm a 25-year-old guy, generally pretty social and outgoing. I've had small anxiety moments before but never anything like this.
About 3 weeks ago I had a flight to visit my family, and while I was in the TSA line a sudden wave of insane nausea, lightheadedness, and disorientation hit me hard (I literally thought I was going to yak on a TSA agent). I made it through the line and tried to drink some water but couldn't get it down. I called a close friend who stayed on the phone with me until I boarded — he kept repeating that I was going to be okay.
Miraculously, I got on the plane and flew. It wasn't the worst thing in the world, but it definitely wasn't pleasant. I went straight to my friend's house and the next few days were fine.
About a week later, I was in an Uber heading from my friend's place to my family's house when the wave hit me again with all the same symptoms. I thought about asking the driver to pull over but white-knuckled through it. Once I got back to where I was staying I was fine for the rest of the day. The next day is when this really started taking over my life.
Since then I wake up every morning extremely nauseous (I've been taking ondansetron / Zofran, which offers some relief) and have had multiple attacks per day. They last 10–15 minutes each — sweaty hands, intense hot and cold flashes, the nausea, lightheadedness, disorientation. One was bad enough that I seriously thought I was dying and almost went to the ER. I'm uninsured, so I held off, and a few hours later I was fine.
Some context that might matter:
- My life has actually been going great. I recently started a successful business and for the first time in a long time I felt genuinely free. None of this is happening because something bad is going on.
- I used to smoke weed daily and drink a few times a week. I cut both completely about 2 weeks ago.
- I started Lexapro through Hims around the same time — 5mg the first week, 10mg now in week 2.
- Sleep here has been rough, partly because of the setting I'm in.
I have an appointment with my family doctor tomorrow. But right now I feel completely stuck — I can't imagine getting back on a plane to go home to my actual life, and that's scaring me almost as much as the attacks themselves.
Has anyone been through something like this? Does it get better? Is this more serious than panic attacks, or is this what panic attacks actually look like? Any advice appreciated.
Thanks in advance.