My boyfriend said he cheated on me while we were taking edibles.
My boyfriend (M23) and me (F23) like to take edibles every weekend and get high, it’s just a nice little wind down from the week. But a couple weeks ago we were high and we were on the couch watching a movie and he started getting sleepy, and that’s pretty normal when we get high is that he’ll get REALLY tired near the end of the night. He started getting sleepy so I turned to him and said goodnight and tried to kiss him but he didn’t try to kiss me back, I did have jellybeans in my mouth so that could’ve been why but it made me feel bad nonetheless. I then told him I love you and he turned away and started mumbling and he said “maybe I love you maybe I don’t, maybe I cheated on you maybe I didnt”, and just for clarification I have a higher tolerance for weed than he does so when I get high I feel it but I’m still pretty coherent so I heard and remember everything he said. I thought his comment was very strange and I started to freak out a little bit, he then sat in silence for like 10 seconds and then he said “I cheated on you and I’m sorry”. I was completely shocked, so shocked that I literally made him say it again and he did say it again super clearly so I started really freaking out and going off on him. He then sat straight up and he was like “I didn’t say that!” And I was like you literally just did! And he kept saying how he didn’t say that and then turned into an argument and completely ruined my high and then I started crying because I could not believe it. Once I started crying he told me he would leave me alone for awhile and he went in our bedroom and went to bed, I bawled my eyes out the entire night and slept on the couch. The next morning he came out to talk to me and I was just so destroyed about the whole situation and we ended up getting into another argument and I felt like he just wasn’t listening to me and was gaslighting me. I even told him I would like him to take a lie detector test but all he said was those aren’t super accurate and it would possibly read something I wouldn’t like. It got to the point where he got so mad that he started crying and making me feel bad and saying how he’s so over me accusing him of cheating. Also for clarification I got cheated on in my last relationship so cheating is a very touchy subject for me and he knows that. I’m a big empath so I did try to console him because I’ve never seen him be so upset like that. We both calmed down a little and talked it out more peacefully but deep down I just kept thinking he was still gaslighting me.
It’s been a couple weeks now and we seem to be good and Ive tried to put it in the past but I just always have in the back of my mind that he has cheated on me and is just refusing to tell me. I would just really like some advice or just a third opinion on this because I’m so sick of this weighing on my mind constantly.