I just need to ramble about my friend if i can even Call him a friend anymore.
So i got this lets ”friend”. lets Call him Jake even if his name is far from that. We are both about 15 so still teens. We used to be extremly good friends but i started to distance myself myself from him cus i was getting tired of him. His whole personality is basicly being a brown kid who acts like a dick head and does things like being on pornhub in class, use his phone even tho its extremly against the rules, blast music, scream things like the N-word etc… All in the name of getting attention. And for some reason still almost everyone loves him. Well exept for me and a few others.
And everything seemed fine enough. Until i started well to distance myself cus i had enough of how he acts and after he ghosted me on a hangout we planed 2 weeks before that. And thats when i geuss he didnt… like. That i did that. So he started to act like a dick forwards me. He started to target me in PE, try to embracce me during lectures or infront of our friend grupp. When i came to school one day and was sad cus my bunny died then he heard and laughed out loud mockingly. Of Course i got mad at this and in my anger called him the N word.
Something he calls me all the time. The thing is. He is arabic and im white. And with that logic he started playing the victim and not only spred rumors that im an actual racist around school. Not only that but he almost in whatever way also almost got the cops called on me too. Tho nothing real happent with what he tried. Now to present day again. And he started now with the whole trying to emberrace me, targetting in everything etc... Ive tried to bring it up with the rest of our friends but They all just say that i act like a child when i try to say against him or something and that i should stop caring about him. And Yeah ive tried. But its hard not to care when that same person is close to everyone in the friend grupp exept me almost. Who still tries to make them turn against me. Who i cant do anything school or social relaited cus he always tries to prove me wrong or argument against it. I mean he could Call me the N word, and i go to say something back and then everyone looks at me like im a child or that im the one at Fault. They always let whatever he does against me slide without batting an eye while They get irretated at me for fighting back.
It just feels unfair. I wana hangout with them cus they are incredibly good friends forwards me but that means i will have to hangout with him too and at this point i feel sick even being close to him. Tho i cant complain anymore cus they say that i should not care and anybody else is tired of hearing it at this point. This has made him get a supuriority complex against me and everysingle time anything like this happens then i always see that smirk grow on his face when he looks at me. That cartoonishly evil smirk. And yeah mayby now you all may say ”just get new friends”. Well the thing to that is. Im extremly introverted and socialt akward. I plsy sports or go out into the city. I prefer to instead stay at home and bake or sketch or play videogames or go on small walks into the sunset while listening to music. Okay whatever. You guys a probobly gona say that i should just grow up or stop caring like i just have internal switches to do that. Sorry for making you all read this but thanks still for doing it. But if you have any tricks or tricks that i can use to stop caring then i would gladly take them.