AITA For going off on my brother over Mother's Day plans?
I (27M) got a message from my brother (30M) yesterday as of writing this to call him as soon as I could. When I called him, he was asking me about what days I have off work and what time my shifts start because my family was trying to plan a gathering for Mother's day and our mom obviously would want all of her kids to be there for the day. I told him I couldn't make any promises because not only do I work into the night shift at my job, but my wife work the morning shift and wouldn't be able to attend even if I didn't need to sleep for my own shift. Because of how different me and my wife's work schedules are, I've told my family in the past that I need some kind of advance notice for any gatherings we have on weekends so we can request the day off or at least make the proper preparations in order to attend.
A little while after we talked, my brother texted me saying that the gathering was going to be a breakfast at a local restaurant that would take place at 8am, because our younger sister is working a double shift at her own job that day and her shift started at 10am. Due to my own work schedule, I wouldn't even be functional enough for a family get together at that hour, and as stated before, my wife would be unable to attend because she's working the morning shift at her own job as well. I told my wife about all of this, and she went to the family group chat to remind everyone that we need advance notice for things like this because not only do our work schedules clash, but both our jobs make our schedules about 3 weeks in advance.
My brother then texted me privately saying something long the lines of "If you didn't wanna go, you could have just said so", in response to my wife saying how much notice we needed in order to make family functions. He then went on to accuse my wife of trying to keep me away from the family because she isn't able to see her's due to her moving out of her home state to be with me, and said that I haven't been able to see the family as often eversince I got married. It was at this point that I ended up losing it.
I sent my brother a long reply reminding him that back when my wife and I were around the family more often, we both worked at the same job and basically had identical work schedules. Obviously we aren't going to be as available as we were in the past now that not only are our schedules drastically different, but my wife also does gig work on her days off in order for us to stay afloat. More was said in this argument, but I can't fit it all into one post. Reddit, AITA?