u/KiplingKD

It is so hard to explain to people why or how it could be possible for me to have had thousands and thousands of panic attacks over the years, often multiple times a day, am aware that I have Panic Disorder, yet still think I’m dying every single time I’m having a panic attack. I still call 911. I call 911 even 30 minutes after the paramedics just came and cleared me.

I have been thinking about how illogical it is and how strange and confusing it must be for others. But at the same time, it is completely logical. If you are just going about your business, having a good day, everything is just normal, etc then all the sudden BOOM heart palpitations and thudding in your chest, numbness in your arms, and you can’t breathe, it is pretty damn logical to assume in that moment that there must be something seriously wrong. When something like that happens completely out of nowhere, really the only thing that DOES make sense is there is some kind of medical emergency happening. ANYBODY would freak out if all the sudden they were having these terrible feelings in their body that did not appear to be provoked or triggered by anything at all.

If every single panic attack was completely identical, I would still be extremely distressed and freaking out, but it would definitely be a lot easier to do this whole “accept the symptoms and let them be” thing. And it would probably be easier to just cope with having them because they would all look the same. But what gets me is that that they are usually NOT all the same.

I can’t tell yall how many times I have cried out “but this time it’s different!” to my boyfriend or friends and I’ll just KNOW that okay sure the other times apparently were just panic attacks but that’s because I never had a sore itchy feeling on my left pinky toe and I’m having that now so this one’s actually real. Just slight variations or different locations of the sensations in my body that I’m sure nobody else would ever notice or pay attention to in their own bodies. At least nobody who doesn’t have panic attacks. Nothing and I mean nothing gets past me haha.

I made the mistake of actually researching heart attacks and causes and symptoms of them and I had been avoiding doing that for so long out of fear that it would cause my body
to manifest those symptoms and make my panic attacks even worse. On one hand some of the stuff I read kind of helped ease some of my worries but at the same time it has just caused me more problems. It’s funny how I didn’t want to read about heart attacks because I knew it would make my panic attacks worse. Not because I was afraid it would actually give me a heart attack although that’s what I think is happening in the moment. It’s the whole fear of fear itself thing that makes this condition so strange to me.

Anyways I just had that thought and wanted to put it out there and wanted to see if anyone related to any of that. I am so grateful for this group. Reading other people’s posts and writing my own posts helps pull me out of an attack like it is right now so thank yall and it’s nice to know I’m not alone.

Does anybody else have a problem with/disagree with some of the more official medical definitions of what a panic attack is? I agree with all of it except for when I come across a definition that describes it as lasting for a very short period of time. Some definitions kind of make it sound like it comes quickly and get super super intense and terrible and then quickly goes away in like 20 minutes or so. I have had many that have been that way, but I don’t think it applies to a lot of my attacks.

For me, it’s more like a painfully slow build-up that can sometimes take hours before I really start to freak out. I’ll just be having these physical sensations that are making me so uncomfortable (racing heart, numbness, the usual stuff) and I will not be able to focus or think about anything else other than every single sensation in my body and trying to stay calm. Even after it peaks and I start to calm down, I’m not actually that much calmer and. I continue to feel the exact same way and have the same physical discomforts that don’t just go away like that. I will still be able to function and do things and go about my day and nobody would even be aware that I am actually having what I would describe as a mild panic attack and those symptoms don’t come and then just go as quickly as some of these definitions make it sound like they do. They linger sometimes for hours and maybe even days. It’s like one extremely long panic attack that just won’t go away.

My panic attacks come in all sorts of varieties and can vary in duration and intensity, but I feel like this type I am describing happens more often than not, and I may have reached the conclusion that I’m probably not dying, but the physical side of it just keeps going and so my anxiety just never really goes away completely. It’s a terrible way to live. Does anybody else relate to this?

I hope this is not too triggering for anyone, but I’ve got to ask this question because I really need an answer and I’m hoping that someone out there might be able to help explain something to me… What actually is the difference between heart attack symptoms and panic attack symptoms? For the longest time I was afraid to look it up online, out of fear that it would trigger a panic attack. Not trigger a heart attack…a panic attack. Which if you think about it, that’s so ridiculous but that’s another topic for another day.

Anyways I decided to go ahead and just try to do a little preliminary research, because after like 15 years of having Panic Disorder I came to the conclusion that reading about heart attacks most certainly would not cause a heart attack, and if I happened to have one right at the precise moment I finally decided to read about them, that would be unbelievably crazy timing. So I went ahead and read up on it a little bit.

I don’t know about anybody else, but my panic attack symptoms are more or less identical to what appears to be most heart attack symptoms. However, I haven’t really found much or any literature on this topic that came from the perspective of someone with panic attacks. Is there anyone out there who has maybe experienced both and has some insight or could point out any relevant differences? Or maybe if there is a physician somewhere in this group who has panic attacks and who has knowledge on the topic, some sort of medical explanation as to the key distinguishing factors between heart attack symptoms and panic attacks most certainly symptoms? It very well could be that there just isn’t a straightforward answer to this, and I’m sure that’s probably the case. I guess I’m just looking for some kind of escape rope to help me pull out of the particularly distressing panic attack episodes.

I have called for an ambulance about 40 times over the last two months. I cancel most of them before they are dispatched to my address, but I have been evaluated by paramedics about 6 times I believe over that period of time. Not on one single occasion did they identify anything concerning and each time they were able to confirm that I was in fact not having a heart attack. You would think this would be enough to calm me down and give me some reassurance that i am probably not going to die, but it’s like, just because those 6 times I wasn’t having a heart attack doesn’t mean that THIS time isn’t a heart attack. My friends and family are so annoyed with my constant panic attacks and I will yell at them to call 911 and instead they just do whatever they can to calm me down because they don’t think it’s in any way necessary for them to actually call for help since these episodes happen regularly throughout the day every day for the last few months. So I have this paranoia that one of these occasions will be the real thing, and nobody will have taken it seriously and I won’t make it to a hospital on time. Just the whole thing is so absurd and I’m so fucking tired of freaking out over every little change or feeling in my body. I detect even the slightest change in what I am sure is just regular normal bodily fluctuations that happen to everybody throughout the day. I am so attuned to every single sensation that it is basically impossible for me to go more than a few hours without having a panic attack. Slight heart rate increase, a fraction of a second of feeling dizzy or something, having an itch behind my ear, just anything will send me into a complete frenzy. So tired of it.

Anyways if anyone has any insight on this topic I would really appreciate hearing what anyone may have to say on the matter and maybe there could be something that others can take away from it too.

Thank you so much!

I hope this is not too triggering for anyone, but I’ve got to ask this question because I really need an answer and I’m hoping that someone out there might be able to help explain something to me… What actually is the difference between heart attack symptoms and panic attack symptoms? For the longest time I was afraid to look it up online, out of fear that it would trigger a panic attack. Not trigger a heart attack…a panic attack. Which if you think about it, that’s so ridiculous but that’s another topic for another day.

Anyways I decided to go ahead and just try to do a little preliminary research, because after like 15 years of having Panic Disorder I came to the conclusion that reading about heart attacks most certainly would not cause a heart attack, and if I happened to have one right at the precise moment I finally decided to read about them, that would be unbelievably crazy timing. So I went ahead and read up on it a little bit.

I don’t know about anybody else, but my panic attack symptoms are more or less identical to what appears to be most heart attack symptoms. However, I haven’t really found much or any literature on this topic that came from the perspective of someone with panic attacks. Is there anyone out there who has maybe experienced both and has some insight or could point out any relevant differences? Or maybe if there is a physician somewhere in this group who has panic attacks and who has knowledge on the topic, some sort of medical explanation as to the key distinguishing factors between heart attack symptoms and panic attacks most certainly symptoms? It very well could be that there just isn’t a straightforward answer to this, and I’m sure that’s probably the case. I guess I’m just looking for some kind of escape rope to help me pull out of the particularly distressing panic attack episodes.

I have called for an ambulance about 40 times over the last two months. I cancel most of them before they are dispatched to my address, but I have been evaluated by paramedics about 6 times I believe over that period of time. Not on one single occasion did they identify anything concerning and each time they were able to confirm that I was in fact not having a heart attack. You would think this would be enough to calm me down and give me some reassurance that i am probably not going to die, but it’s like, just because those 6 times I wasn’t having a heart attack doesn’t mean that THIS time isn’t a heart attack. My friends and family are so annoyed with my constant panic attacks and I will yell at them to call 911 and instead they just do whatever they can to calm me down because they don’t think it’s in any way necessary for them to actually call for help since these episodes happen regularly throughout the day every day for the last few months. So I have this paranoia that one of these occasions will be the real thing, and nobody will have taken it seriously and I won’t make it to a hospital on time. Just the whole thing is so absurd and I’m so fucking tired of freaking out over every little change or feeling in my body. I detect even the slightest change in what I am sure is just regular normal bodily fluctuations that happen to everybody throughout the day. I am so attuned to every single sensation that it is basically impossible for me to go more than a few hours without having a panic attack. Slight heart rate increase, a fraction of a second of feeling dizzy or something, having an itch behind my ear, just anything will send me into a complete frenzy. So tired of it.

Anyways if anyone has any insight on this topic I would really appreciate hearing what anyone may have to say on the matter and maybe there could be something that others can take away from it too.

Thank you so much!

I went almost a month without calling for an ambulance. Went out of town for my brothers wedding last weekend, and while we were at the hotel, I called. I thought I got away with it because I went and met them outside and it was in the middle of the night, but my fiancée saw one of the EKG pad thingies on my leg the next morning. I thought I had removed them all 🤣. Totally busted.

There was nothing actually wrong by the way. Except the shitty panic attack. But thought it was kind of a funny story.

I don’t know if anybody else has gotten to this point ever, but I am truly so unbelievably tired of this. I truly do not know what to do. I cannot live like this. I don’t think anybody can. You cannot actually be convinced that you’re dying this many times every single day and have a functional life. It’s horrible.

I had my first panic attack about 13 years ago, and it just came out of nowhere. Thought I was having a heart attack. I was very confused by the whole thing because I wasn’t doing anything stressful, strenuous, or anxiety-provoking. I was just sitting on my couch watching a movie and looking at beading patterns or some shit on Pinterest. I was in a good mood. Then it happened and I just completely freaked out and ever since then I have been having panic attacks off and on. I’ll go a month with having a lot of them, maybe a year off, a few weeks on, a month off, etc. but lately it has been SOOO unbelievably bad. I probably on average have 4-5 panic attacks per day, ranging from mild to calling 911 multiple times, and I just do not understand why this is happening. Just thinking about a panic attack will literally trigger a panic attack.

I am constantly exhausted. It is not sustainable. I can talk myself out of many of them, but even that is a process that takes up so much of my energy and mental resources. When I say “talk myself out of it,” I basically just mean I managed to not call for an ambulance bc I eventually became somewhat swayed that perhaps I am not actually dying. But every time it happens, there is something slightly different that happens that didn’t happen any of the other times (it could be like my right big toe itching) and it’s enough to throw me into a complete spiral that i cannot seem to stop.

I am really grateful for this group and have found a lot of posts on here very helpful. So thank you all for putting in your input and sharing your own experiences. I have read a lot about exposure therapy and sitting with the feelings and just letting them pass, but I tell you what it is really fucking hard if not impossible for me to do that. I find the panic attack symptoms to be so unbelievably unbearable that I almost can’t even really fathom doing that. I will do all sorts of crazy things to try to make it stop. Lately since I’ve gotten so used to this I have definitely learned many skills that have aided me, and I’m oddly a bit calmer during an episode, but it doesn’t change the fact that they are happening in the first place. I cannot continue this way. If the attack subsided within a few minutes, that would be one thing. I’d be able to deal with that discomfort a lot better. But from start to finish each panic attack can last for like 3-4 hours. It might not be this constant adrenaline the entire time like it is at the beginning, but that is about the amount of time that it takes from when the attack begins to when I eventually conclude that I am okay. It is extremely and I mean EXTREMELY difficult to sit with that level of discomfort for that much time. Multiple times per day. I feel like I’m just completely losing it.

I have lived with this pleasant little issue for a very very long time, but it’s not until super recently where it’s gotten me to a point of like what the fuck is going on. It’s truly miserable.

Does anybody have any suggestions as to ways to PREVENT the panic attack from happening at all? I realize I have more or less conditioned my brain at this point to react the way it has been reacting but even having that knowledge or just knowing that doesn’t seem to be good enough in helping me. Logic does not apply here. Is anyone aware of any medications that might help in prevention? I currently take an SSRI, and I do also have Xanax for emergencies but I don’t even bother taking it honestly. As crazy as this sounds I just don’t bother. It takes too long to work and also it doesn’t help me that much and I don’t want to lean on it. I am much more concerned with figuring out how to stop the cycle and stop the episodes from occurring in the first place than I am with how to make them stop once they’ve started. I realize the two are related and I am not saying that the latter is unimportant bc obviously it is, but if someone has any suggestions on maybe lifestyle-related factors or just anything preventative that would be greatly appreciated. I cannot even begin to put into words how truly and seriously desperate I am. This is completely debilitating on every level and is quite simply, as I’m sure you all know, not a sustainable way to live. It’s just not sustainable. A human being cannot live and thrive this way. It cannot be done. Please, if anyone has anything helpful at all I would appreciate it more than anything. You can DM me if you’d rather not say anything in such a public manner. I don’t care. I’m just in serious need of assistance