Daughter
My mum was a single mum and a nurse. Growing up we had no money. Once a year she used to try and take me out to a nice restaurant and she’d take me to an affordable shop to get a nice dress. She wanted me to experience the nice things in life so I had confidence in certain settings wherever I ended up.
Tonight I am 32 and I was out to a nice dinner, and as I was waiting for the bathroom an outgoing little girl also in the line, maybe 7yrs old, in a gorgeous yellow dress tried to help me find a free cubicle, then ran off with her hair flowing around the corner.
My mum died 3 months ago. I haven’t had kids yet. I’ll never get to watch her enjoy my daughter running off in a pretty dress at a nice restaurant, hair flowing around the corner. I could have, in that moment, watching the girl run off, bend over and s c r e a m with grief.
I’m going through a really hard time right now with my relationship and it’s the kind of dilemma where you just want to call your mum and cry into the phone. But she’s just gone. My heart has never felt so irreparably broken.