Since i was a kid growing up , i've been reminded constantly of the well trodden path I'm supposed to follow from all aspects of my social life and I loathe it .
That's mostly the reason why I want to get a hysterectomy so badly , although it's not a much viable option in Vietnam due to it being so out of the norm and often being frowned upon .We asians put a strong emphasis on familial continuation and children so occasional interrogation is to be expected .
I find that they only offer tubal ligation procedure in most clinics so I'm thinking of visiting another country instead to hopefully get a full hysterectomy there . No more " you'll change your mind " or " When you meet the right person ..." etc , no thanks , I would rather end up dead alone than to bring another being into this world , a full fleshed human that I don't even want in the first place . I would grow resentful for sure and it's no good for anyone involved .
I'm just scared that I might end up with a kid due to societal pressure and ruin my whole life with that decision . What if I can't stand the isolation and finally give in ? What if I got disheartened having no one to stand by and be my faithful ally ? I just want to get it over with as quick as possible and put an end to all of the relentless questionings .