every word and "wisdom" i gained after everything, still cant even be kind to myself
emotional posting but whatever
i like helping people, i love helping people, i would give my life away to see another smile genuienly
yet after all the things ive been through, i still cant even help myself, yet look myself in the eyes and tell myself the very words i use for people who are down
not like my words mean any meaning or weight, im just another vessel with a soul and this weary body with the soul is really tired
i keep lying myself that i cant be not strong after everything, i know its nonsense and people will always have highs and lows, im very young yet everything feels like a burden
maybe these thoughts will change tomorrow, then come back like a bullet rain with every memory violently stuffed in it
sorry if im not making any sense, i hit my head with a huge chunk of wood, i wanna do even more, i cant stop myself anymore
harmed myself after a while a few days ago, i dont even know why i did it
after all those pills, am i still myself?
sorry