A girl said no to me and asked if we can stay friends.
So I'm 23. In my previous office a teammate of mine showed me a girl, they used to live in the same area but weren't friends or anything just knew that they live near each other.
Anyways, I saw her for the first time and I was done. She was short, had curly hairs, droopy eyes, wore specs. Overall, my type. As I'm not really an extrovert-ey person I couldn't sum up any courage to talk to her. I'd always look at her from a distance whenever we'd be working same shifts.
Few months later I asked for a team switch and went in her team. Few weeks later we started talking. Some time later a few other colleagues planned a little outing to a dam. We went there together.
Everything felt great. Everyday I'd see her for the first time it'd feel like "warm sunshine on a winter morning". We went on a couple outings with our team to Villas and stuff. She'd sleep next to me, we'd cuddle each other, I'd kiss her forehead whenever she went to sleep in my arms.
It felt like she was girlfriend yet she wasn't. Suddenly she resigned, I was heartbroken. A couple weeks later I did too.
A couple weeks before our last working days, my team planned another outing to a villa. We went. We slept together that night. Same thing we'd cuddle each other, I'd put my hand inside her tshirt and grab her waist. It wasn't anything sexual. But I felt like some kind of intimacy was there.
That night as a parting gift I gave her a Mikasa Scarf and a book - Tuesdays with Morrie. Inside that book I hid a little note confessing my feelings. Asking her out. Telling her that her presence felt like "Warm sunshine on a winter morning".
She didn't see that note for weeks. One night we had a fight because I wanted to meet her and she couldn't seem to find time. In that heat I confessed on texts. She said no.
She kept saying to stay friends. She didn't want to let me go but keep me as a friend. It hurts to know that I'm JUST a friend to her. I've been avoiding talking to her but my phone is filled with her pictures and her little vlogs that she'd make. She felt perfect she felt like everything.
Idk if I can stay FRIENDS with her and keep getting my heart broken over and over again. Idk what to do anymore.
Please advise if you have been through something similar. I'd like to know women's perspective in this as well.