Brothers too close
I’m wondering if I’m being overly sensitive..
I’ve been feeling very criticized by my sister-in-law (and all my in laws) regarding my parenting. It’s not usually direct insults, but constant comments and opinions about what she thinks my kids should be doing differently.
Like questioning why my kids don’t do sleepovers, saying I’m too strict, implying I should have signed them up for hockey/football (they do skateboarding)
now saying my two boys (who are 5 and 8) spend “too much time together” and that they shouldn't share a room.
Now the thing that's got me all worked up is she's saying that when she’s in our neighborhood she’s going to start taking my oldest son out on his own because she thinks the boys need more separation. She didn't ask, she told me.
The thing is, my kids HAVE spent time separately before with family members. My aunt has taken one child out individually for birthdays, etc. It’s not like they are never apart. They’re just close brothers and spend a lot of time together naturally. Her kids don't spend any time together. She also keeps her son away from our boys for some reason. Her son is 4 years older than my oldest and is considered a problem child.
This is bothering me way more than I want it to. I think maybe because it feels like there’s always an underlying message that I’m somehow failing my kids or limiting them, or so thatsbwhat chagpt tells me.
I’m open to constructive feedback as a parent, but this feels more like ongoing judgment based on her personal parenting style/preferences.
Am I overreacting here? Would this bother you too? Should I be fine with her wanting to spend time with one kid.