Hi Two Hot Takes!! HUGEEE FAN! Both me and my s/o have been long time listeners on YouTube, since the beginning actually! I just had a question on how to move on from Something that happend recently. For context, my (25F) and my s/o Y (25m) have been together for years. A couple of years ago when we were still in school, I met J, (25M) and i instantly knew that J and Y would be amazing friends. So I introduced and them and sure enough they became really great friends, and I would even say family! Well fast forward to now. Me and Y are getting married and of course Y asked J to be apart of the wedding. He said yes and all things were great until a couple of months ago. Y would tell me that J was getting distance. J would either not respond to text or calls, and if he did, he was brief. Y would try his best to check in on him, but chucked it up to him to just being busy. Now fast forward to now, Y reached out to his groomsmen about wedding stuff, and J texted him privately with a long message basically that he is dropping out of the wedding, and that this is him ending their friendship, and he didnt want to explain his reasoning.
This shocked not only Y but me!! We both cried because Y doesnt have many friends but this person was like family to him. And it caused a lot of heart ache. And of course Y responded asking for a reason, but J left him on read. I dont see the point in asking him myself. But ik Y wants to call him to ask him what happend. We dont think he'll answer the call but what else is there to do? I just feel so heartbroken for Y. Like this has really hurt him and im losing sleep over this because I genuinely did not expect J to do this, or atleast to walk out with out an explanation. I mean Ik people may disagree on whether we owe people explanations when they end friendships but even if he doesnt want to be friends anymore or he feels their friendship has grown apart, (which are both valid reasons) then I dont understand why he couldn't just say that. I am the type of person that dwells a lot, when things like this happen, I lose actual sleep and get sick. Im just trying my best to be there for Y.
But I guess my question is, what do I do to support Y? Like apart of me feels guilty for introducing them .... its been like 5 years since then. How do I help me and Y move on from this? Idk, maybe I've just never experienced this. Ive had really great friends end normally (move to different schools, change in life path etc) but like I said, this one feels very unique because he was close enough to Y that we asked him to be part of our wedding. And I personally have never had a friend send a long message basically saying its over ... nor not providing a reason for that matter. Idk. I just hate to see Y down. How do we move on?