I'm (18M) and I know 3 years sounds like a long time — trust me, I'm aware. But I honestly still haven't been able to get over her.
She was the one who ended things, and she never really gave me a reason. I'm still not sure if I did something that made her uncomfortable or came across the wrong way. All I know is it was a late Saturday night. She said she was going to have a shower and we'd chat after. I noticed she was taking longer than usual and I just sat there staring at my phone feeling uneasy. Then instead of her usual message, I got a breakup text — one I couldn't even finish reading before I started crying so hard I couldn't see my screen.
I was a mess for months after that. To make things harder, we still work together to this day, so I've had to see her and talk to her like I didn't once plan out our entire future together. And then one day at work I watched her walk by with one of my friends at the time. I just froze. It felt like a punch to the chest.
I ended up falling into some really bad habits. A few months after the breakup I overdosed and ended up in hospital from midnight until 7AM. I'm still not entirely sure why I did it. One of my closest friends found out and had his girlfriend drive him to my house so he could be with me. If he hadn't shown up, I honestly don't think I'd be here. I'm grateful every day for that.
Over the last few weeks I've been dreaming about her almost 5 nights a week. One dream keeps coming back — she asks me to get back together, and I jump into her arms and start crying, and then I wake up. I've had that exact dream 4 times now and I don't really know what to make of it or what to do.
I'm sorry for putting all of this out here, but I didn't know where else to turn. I feel like I'd just be a burden to my friends and family if I told them how I really feel.
Thanks for reading. If you have any advice, I'd really appreciate it.