I put myself in a situation I don't know how to get out of
I'm not going to go into a huge long backstory. About 4.5 years ago it was under well given advice to end my relationship of 15 years and leave the state and start new elsewhere. Which I have done, but due to his incarceration and us not being married but both our names being on everything together the civil process of splitting and dividing property and assets is like watching paint dry due to the enormous backlog of cases during Covid. When I left, I left with literally nothing. No change of clothes, no wallet, no car, no toothbrush, nothing. And it's okay, material items can be replaced and I ended up in Alabama.
When I was younger I sustained an injury to my left leg and hip that left some vascular problems; being more prone to blood clots even on anticoagulants and a very ill healed foot fracture that causes problems when it gets super cold out and seizures from blunt force trauma. I went into a program designed to help me get my shit together and life back on track and I was doing great with it. I got my driver's license(although at the moment they have a medical hold on it), birth certificate, social security card, clothes, shoes, some personal items, the normal things most people take for granted. I've worked in the veterinary field for over 22 years now but the place they relocated me to is a small town and with at times having a medical suspension on my license I was limited on where to work where the program would help with transportation.
I found a dog grooming and boarding facility 5 minutes away that needed help and she paid cash. Was the pay great, no, but anything is better then nothing. I was responsible for prep work and bathing of the grooming dogs(ranged anywhere from 6-18 dogs per day), taking care of the boarding animals(feeding, walking, medication, cleaning, basically anything they needed) and then I was responsible for all the laundry and cleaning the shop. Which at times, is a lot for 1 person. Her excuse was always "she's going to do whatever she has to do to make money." Now, her shop is on their property(they own, no mortgage), they converted an old house trailer. Her husband makes very good money and he pays all the bills except the power bill for the business. He also buys all the horse feed and round bales as she has 3 horses as well. Whatever money she brings in just goes into a savings account that they use for vacations(and they go on about 5-6 per year) or "fun" money. But unless it's something she wants or a vacation she wants to go on she gets very pissy with him about it. She also doesn't want to spend any of "her" money on their 2 daughters and grandchildren. And I know it now hindsight is 20/20, the red flags were there, I realize that now.
For about 3 months I had been really having some issues with that leg so I finally asked if they would take me to the hospital which they were happy to do and actually lectured me and said I should have said something a lot sooner. I had developed a very bad DVT in my calf as well as in my thigh on the left leg but I also had bi-lateral pulmonary embolisms. It was a 16 day hospital stay. They ran a ridiculous amount of tests. Long story short deep down somewhere in the gene mapping process I had a "dormant" gene for a rare type of blood cancer that the stress of this event triggered. Well super.
We all decided the best course of action was to begin immediate aggressive treatment. And it sucked. It was not recommended for me to stay in a communal living situation like what the program offered and bless them they tried so hard to help but I didn't feel it would be fair to the other women in the program to be shifted all around again.
So my boss offered me the bedroom in the boarding shop. They put new flooring down, painted, cleaned, helped me get a bed, side table and dresser. In exchange for the room I would be responsible for taking care of the boarding dogs on the weekends, which I thought to be fair. The med can would come get me super early in the morning, take me for treatment and bring me back and I'd usually be back around 8:30am. Then I would wash dogs for her, do the daily routine and by the end of each day I was miserably sick, nauseous, exhausted and in so much pain. Then the power bill came in, right when I had been there around 3.5 weeks. And you know how sometimes it'll show you last year's usage compared to now, well with me being there it only increased $26. We had never discussed ME paying the whole power bill but suddenly I was expected to. So now I'm working 7 days a week, paying the power bill for the business(which in the summer was almost $575 at the highest) and I'm fucking exhausted.
At this point my doctors sat me down and we had a frank talk. They were worried about me and I couldn't keep going on like that. So they called my boss in and sat her down and talked to her about it. She agreed to hire another bather, I would be responsible for letting the boarding dogs out one last time at night and on the weekends. Still 7 days a week but it was what it is. I don't have a lot of overhead as I qualify for UAB Charity Care and she knew that and I would just keep saving every penny I could. Turns out I'm glad I did because I was still expected to pay the power bill. And that drained my account quick and fast. And I eventually had to show her bank statements to prove that fact. She said she would go back to paying the power bill, but the way she said it irritated me and every single time the power bill was due for a few days before and a few days after that's all I'd hear about. It finally got to the point where I told them that I was applying for medical housing near UAB and they begged me not to, said I'd basically become part of the family and how much they appreciated me.
At this point I had been working for her for about almost 2 years. And unless I was hospitalized I had not had a single day off. It was when we were going into the first big freeze of the winter when I noticed some breathing issues and I would cough up a little bit of blood every morning. I let it go on for a week, because I was born with asthma and cold, dry air always makes it worse. The cancer had spread to my left lung lobe. And when I say I sat in that hospital bed and stared at the wall for 12 hours straight on the critical care ward just completely shut down. My oncologist and hematologist had been begging me for so long to slow down, you're not getting enough rest, nutrition, I needed a break. I explained my situation to them, I was on the medical housing list but there were so many people in front of me. So they kept me there on the critical care floor and limited visitation to only 2 hours per day for 30 days.
I was expecting to go back to the grooming shop, but because of the weather and because of the cold they said they had a "family meeting" and decided to move me up the the house. That I could be trusted enough. I have a bedroom with a bathroom that connects to it on one side of the house and their room is on the complete opposite end of the house. I've got my dog, they have 7 dogs, a cat and the horses.
They also have a lake house that's not far away at all and they spend Friday-Monday there during the summer. So I am still responsible for my dog(which obviously I should be), all their animals and the boarding animals while they're at the lake house and on vacation. And so far they already have 3 vacations planned this summer averaging about a week per trip.
I'm also responsible for all the laundry, swapping out bedding, the dishes, taking the trash out(you have to drive the trash out, the trash cans are on the complete opposite side of the property), keeping all the floors clean, dusting, washing windows, keeping the front porch blown-off and tidy, buying groceries, making dinner Monday night-Thursday night, cleaning bathrooms. Basically, a live-in maid. And I never agreed to that and I have asked 4 times now to go back down to the groom shop and they tell me no. They don't want to worry about me. She's started to fill-up my room down there with junk/extra storage.
The problem I'm facing now is I TOLD her, I marked it on the calendar in her appointment book and the calendar that hangs on their refrigerator that I'm having a test and biopsy done, I'll be in the hospital for 72 hours and then I'll have to have 72 hours of no bending or lifting when I'm released to go home. I scheduled this BEFORE they scheduled their cruise. So last night I brought it up. She asked me to please reschedule with the hospital that she would not close down for boarding animals while they were away because "she has to do what she has to do to make money." I've also seen her books and bank records. In no way, shape or form is she hurting for money whatsoever. She's a cash or check only business.I can't reschedule it. When you are on Charity Care you take the time and day they give you. I told her that and she told me that I would need to pay someone to cover the time when I was in the hospitalized. I called my social worker at the hospital this morning just absolutely sobbing because I don't know what to do. She's managed to move me way way up the medical housing list and she's going to try to reach out to a few other people. I don't have enough money in the bank anymore to leave and I think they know that and use it to their advantage. I am physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually tired. I don't know what to do.