u/LegEnvironmental5345

Advice

i am kind of confused and looking for outside perspective on my relationship.

My boyfriend recently brought up the idea of potentially being poly / involving another person. For context, when we first started dating, he was also seeing someone else at the same time, and I didn’t have an issue with that. For the past couple months though, it’s just been the two of us.

When he brought this up, I told him I’m okay with it, but I’m not ready right now. I said I would need to meet the person first, and more importantly, I feel like our relationship needs to be more stable and secure before anything like that happens. I also told him I need to feel more seen and secure in general before I can feel fully comfortable.

He responded by saying it’s okay as long as it’s not a “never,” because he can’t do that.

That part is what’s confusing me. I am okay with the idea overall, but I feel like there’s pressure building for me to be ready sooner than I actually am. I don’t want to feel rushed or like I have to eventually agree just to keep the relationship.

At the same time, I understand where he’s coming from. I’m not saying I would never consider it I just need things to feel solid between us first before anything happens, and I need to feel more seen and secure in the relationship overall.

i guess I’m trying to figure out if this is a normal way these conversations go in poly situations, or if it’s okay for me to feel uneasy about the pressure I’m feeling.

Any advice would help

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u/LegEnvironmental5345 — 3 days ago