u/LegalComfortable3833

I’m (30M) trying to figure out if I should leave My wife (30F) We have 3 daughters. 7, 2 and 1 month. When things are good, they’re great. But when they’re bad, they’re unbearable. I’m a very laid back guy and very present father. I work full time and My wife stays at home with the kids (not that that’s easy at all) but she’s constantly putting Me down and belittling Me when she’s in a mood. She has borderline personality disorder. I’ve been very understanding of this for years. I do chores around the house, get them whatever they ask for (within reason) but she constantly tells Me how lazy I am and stupid, and lashes out at Me in front of the kids. Anytime I call her out on something it turns into a full blown fight, she’s always telling Me I don’t understand what she’s dealing with and how overstimulated she is from the kids. If I’m not at work, I have the kids with Me doing whatever needs to be done. I don’t need any praise at all, what I do need is to just not be nagged and fussed at 24/7 over how I don’t care, do enough, shouldn’t ever complain about being tired too because “I get to clock out from being a parent while I’m at work” keep in mind My job is manual labor, problem solving and critical thinking all day (building and fixing tooling for large machinery) and it’s 95-110° inside where I work at all times. Then I come home, immediately get fussed at for anything that hasn’t been done, and told how exhausted and touched out she is. I don’t complain I take the kids and try to give her some breathing room. She hates the way I do everything, fold clothes, wash dishes, change diapers etc. and I do change all the diapers in the house and bathe the kids. And no I don’t do anything weird when I fold the clothes or do dishes it’s just “always wrong” she tells Me I’m doing it wrong on purpose so I don’t have to do it. Which isn’t true. I don’t mind doing most of the work. I don’t go do hobbies, I use to play tournament golf (haven’t played in over a year now) haven’t played My guitar in months, work and home are the only places I go. And honestly I could deal with all that if I just wasn’t constantly being told “you suck, you’re lazy, you’re always complaining” I can’t keep doing this. I’m tired of arguing when all I wanted to do was have a conversation. She seems to have developed more of a victim mentality and explains it to Me like she is doing everything on her own. Which obviously she’s not. I genuinely love her to death. But she has kicked Me out of our house twice now when she got real mad. She’s very mentally abusive. When I tell her she’s being ridiculous or to stop being disrespectful and just talk to Me she says I’m “whining like a b*tch” it wasn’t always like this but has been for past 1.5 years or longer. I’ve tried everything and I just don’t know how much longer I can do this. I hate the thought of My daughters not getting tucked in by Me every night and wondering why I’m not there. Those are My babies. The main reason I haven’t left yet is for them. I’m sure I left out a lot of stuff but I don’t know what to do. Looking for advice from people that have been through similar situations. Thanks