u/Legitimate-Name-4796

i started with a new therapist(amft) today and while going over intake she asked me about past suicidal ideation. i have had passive suicidal ideation for many years but only made an active plan to end my life last year which was my wake up call to get help. when she asked about active si i used a time when i got into my car with the intention of crashing it. she told me that was still passive because I did not have to procure the car and i already had it in my possession. i feel very dismissed and made to feel dumb. she made it sound like i just didn’t understand the question nor did she seem sympathy to what i consider to be kinda traumatic. am i overthinking this? or is this a way most therapist would respond

I was in short term free therapy provided by my college for about 3 months. I was extremely fond of my therapist, i loved seeing her and would count down the days until our next appointment. Our last 2 sessions were case management finding me a new therapist and we didn’t have the chance for a termination session. I literally don’t know what to do with myself, I’ve been crying nonstop since we ended things. She was the only person i had to talk to and the first and only person i told many things. Shes also the first person who has genuinely expressed care and told me she was proud of me. I believe she is the only reason I have been able to not relapse for as long as I have. How am I supposed to accept that i am never really going to see her again. I fee gross and wrong too because she was my only therapist but I was one of many clients for her so she probably isn’t sharing in these emotions. It hurts more because normally i would discuss this with her but i cant :(