u/Lekkerepruim

Hi all, I’ve been religiously “married” to the father of my child who abandoned me pregnant and now is in no contact with me ever since. Now I live back at my parent’ house.

I feel ashamed of where my life ended up. I thought I’d have my own appartement, my own cozy home, my own family. Instead I live in a house that doesn’t feel like mine and in a city I don’t like

My mom is very critical of me because I leave clutter behind and she criticises my parenting. She never compliments me. Whenever I show desperation or sadness she always says “be grateful you have a child.” I am grateful but I also feel alone and trapped at times.

I don’t work right now and my entire life revolves around caring for my baby. I love my child, but I feel lonely, emotionally exhausted, and like my own life disappeared.
I do think of finding a job, but I’m very sceptical about daycare and I’d like to care for my baby myself instead that someone else does it

Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever feel normal or happy again. I don’t even know where to begin rebuilding my life.

Has anyone been through something similar and actually gotten to a better place?