First trip
I got my first yield extracted this week. It was so little that I didn’t measure the amount. I decided to use a meth pipe to smoke it so that I make the most of it. I was so patient in order not to burn it. It melted and gradually the vapor started to form. I took it. A tingling sensation in my spine started to form, especially at the bottom. I decided to take another hit with more vapor. Here the shit started to come. I became more aware of my physical body. I got grounded in my body and was able to see all reality to be clear. SoI felt something bad is about to happen and a train is about to hit me. So I decided to stop here and relax myself. I got rid of the last hit which was all I had and the pipe.
I got sexually harassed when I was little. So I dissociated myself from my body. It feels like as if I see reality from behind and the observe it rather than actually being in it.
So, being normal using this small amount was strange. I don’t know what to do. I have been doing a lot of therapy before this. And now I feel like I am unprepared and would think it is better to stay dissociated.