For example, I feel super comfortable around my guitar teacher, who's 30 years older than me, but when I'm around girls my age I only think about when our meeting's finished and I get to go back home. I wish I had more older friends I could hang out with, cuz he doesn't have as much time as I wish he had for me ☹️
Like, he's there, but he's such a fucking workaholic manchild, I swear to God. You can't talk with him normally, he's either not acting serious and cracking stupid jokes in inappropriate situations, or being angry and yelling at you for daring to talk to him. Seeing a daughter with a loving dad who spends time with her is almost painful. I want a loving family so bad. But I know it's lost, I've already lived my childhood, I soon turn 17, I will never be a happy little kid in her dad's arms, feeling loved and appreciated. Not having to walk on eggshells and watch my every word.